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May 10th, 2012
04:37 PM ET
Breast-feeding: Too much of a good thing?It's hard to avoid staring at the cover of Time Magazine this week. If you're on social media like Twitter and Facebook, the widely shared image may have arrived on your screen before you ever saw it in the supermarket. The provocative cover shows Jamie Lynne Grumet, a 26-year-old mother from Los Angeles, breast-feeding her son. This isn't your typical mom-and-baby shot: Grumet's son is 3. In case you were wondering, Grumet told CNN's Erin Burnett that her son is actually breast-feeding in that now-iconic image. Grumet said her own mother breast-fed her until age 6, and Grumet still remembers it. "I'm proud of her," Grumet said. The picture promotes an article about the growing popularity of "attachment parenting", a theory first advocated by Dr. Bill Sears and his wife, Martha, in their 1992 best-selling guide “The Baby Book.” The Searses argue that co-sleeping, “baby wearing” (where the baby is attached to the parent with a sling) and extended breast-feeding will help parents respond better to the individual needs of their babies. Celebrities such as Mayim Bialik of "The Big Bang Theory" are also promoting ideas about attachment parenting. Bialik said on Friday that she still breast-feeds her 3-year-old son. "He's not done breast-feeding, and I'm not ready to tell him not to," she said. Many moms and dads have strong opinions about these practices, especially the breast-feeding advice. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends babies be breast-fed exclusively for the first six months of their lives. "We don't all nurse older kids," Bialik said of mothers who subscribe to attachment parenting ideas. "But the notion that a child's voice matters, that every child is different, that's the basis of attachment parenting." Heather Curtis, wife of Fark.com founder Drew Curtis, told CNN's Geek Out that she practiced breast-feeding for an extended period, carried her babies in slings and practiced co-sleeping, as Bialik did. So did Caryn Rogers, a science writer for the Preeclampsia Foundation. "I didn't really choose to eschew conventional care so much as chose to get what I believed was the most evidence-based care," Rogers said. Grumet said that sleeping with her baby does not affect intimacy with her husband. Watch: Breast-feeding cover-mom defends pose "I think intimacy is extremely important in a marriage and I think a strong marriage is going to be a great foundation to show your children how to be raised confident and happy and I had that with my family, too," she said. Time: Extended breast-feeding is more common than we think CNN.com readers expressed mixed views on the subjects of the best age to stop breast-feeding and the appropriateness of the Time cover in general. See what they said. We want to know what you think. Is it OK to breast-feed well past toddler-hood, or is it too much of a good thing? soundoff (3,790 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 Next »Leave a Reply to Dunlar
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Get a behind-the-scenes look at the latest stories from CNN Chief Medical Correspondent, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Senior Medical Correspondent Elizabeth Cohen and the CNN Medical Unit producers. They'll share news and views on health and medical trends - info that will help you take better care of yourself and the people you love.
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How did she produce an offspring with such a severe appearance deficit.
Breastfeeding is fine, even great, certainly recommended. But don't put such a provocative picture on a national magazine. Show some taste. That kid looks like he's ready for PeeWee football...
I'm not sure what you look like, but you can put your pictures up for comparison. We do well in bashing people but we may not be better than them in anything when paired up. The reason they put such provocative picture for you and I to see is to enable us do exactly what we are doing right now, that is, having a discussion about it. I think it's time we have real discussion about real issues in this country rather than watching what Km K and her likes are doing on tv.
Sorry, Mo, but that response makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
Kent, it makes complete sense to me. You may see it differently, but you and I wouldn't be on this blog arguing about the subject if it weren't for the provocative picture as you had called it. Things you keep to yourself and in private are not subjective to public opinion/discussion until you bring it out into the open for all to see and comment on.
As the parent of a teen I have a different perspective on this. Teens who have had mummy and daddy do everything for them. who have lived life doing what they want, had every whim met cannot face disappoinment and do not know how to handle consequences of their actions. Something as simple as putting your child to bed in their bed, letting them learn how to go to sleep without you, is one of the building blocks of the foundation of raising an adult. They are not your little kiddies forever. You have a responsibility to raise them to be independent adults. Their first taste of responsibility and independence cannot happen when you drop them off at college. I think these uber-parents are selfishly wearing these badges of false selflessness so they can impress their peers and frankly aren't thinking about the consequences down the road. The current teens of helicopter parents are having a terrible time becoming adults. I cannot imagine the problems these 24-7 attached kids are going to have 12-15 years from now. Parenting is not a fad. It's a responsibility.
100% agree....our societys going to heIl in a handbasket
You are absolutely wrong. I was breastfed until the age of 5yrs and I have to tell you, you are not more responsible than I am nor more successful nor more educated etc,, so the opinion you hold is a complete nonsense. Breastfeeding a child or sleeping together with your children does not stop them from being responsible or growing up in life and I am a practical example of that. So, please stop all these nonsense. If you do not wish to breastfeed your children then good luck with that, but don't tell me BS.
I strongly disagree. I have raised two children who are now 9 and 7. I am an attachment parent and I breastfed my daughter till she was two and my son till he self-weaned at 4 and a half. They are VERY independent, extremely comfortable with themselves and others, are popular and outgoing. I couldn't be more proud of them and how they are developing. And yes, I do credit that to my parenting style, that I was home with them during their formative years (and continue to be). My children have always come first. But that does not mean that they get everything that they want – far from it. I do however respect them as people and I allow them to give voice to their feelings.
Let me clarify one thing. 'Breastfeeding' an older child is basically comforting that child with the breast more than it is feeding the child at that point. So my perspective is that I would rather my child get comfort from my body and a real warm loving person than sucking on some horrible plastic device shoved in his mouth to silence him.
I'm the mother of 3 young adults, all independent. Actually they were even financially independent very close to 18 (one before), work and go to college. I didn't realize we were attachment parenting, but that's what we were doing. Even as toddlers they were always ready to explore the world. They learned hard work by being required to help, but independence I never had to teach. They, like all children sought it naturally, and their confidence and security paved the way. You think your kids are independent because you put them to bed. I think they are because they were secure in your care.
Helicopter parents are complete opposites to attachment parents. Attachment parents have a basic philosophy of trusting children. Helicopter parents don't trust children or anyone else, so they hover trying to control everything.
I totally agree with you in the END the kids will still blame their Parents for their failures that is the sad part Its always Mom and Dads fault I am a useless piece of Merde
Yeah, extended breastfeeding has been the downfall of our society. That makes sense giving our high breastfeeding rates. *ROLLS EYES*
I think the problem is people force their kids to grow up too fast. Young kids are hearing about s e x and drugs. It's easier to toss your kids out into the world rather than protect them. I was what most would consider an overprotected child, and I turned out just fine as an adult. I got a job as soon as I turned 15 and went to college and graduated college with a masters degree. I have never accepted a government handout. I'm not addicted to anything, nor have I ever been. I've had one relationship, my husband who I grew up with and knew my entire life. We are late 20's and completely debt free and own a beautiful home. Need I go on? I got teased a bit by my friends, but I'm also the only one now who isn't on welfare an a single parent. Obviously I turned out for the better. So what if I didn't know much about s e x until my early teen years. I think I was better off because of that. Some degree of "immaturity" is a good thing. However immaturity isn't laziness. Laziness in my household would have never been accepted. Why does our society encourage kids to grow up so fast? There is a lifetime to learn about all the things of the world, why push it on a child. I say letting be innocent and carefree as long as possible is the greatest gift you can give them since they can only have that for such a short time as it is. A 3 or 4 year old is not far from a baby.
Child molester.
In Third World countries where there is no access to birth control, extended breast feeding is the only fertility control that women have. But in America no one thinks of that. Still, some mothers in developed countries want the closeness that comes from nursing children for extended lengths of time.
Shrieks of horror come from people who don't understand or approve. It is forever thus.
Exactly!
Do a search...yes a woman breastfeeding CAN get pregnant! They do all the time. BTW if a mother wants that closeness with her children...she puts them in her lap and reads a story to them. 😉
Very often, those in what you call third world countries appear more enlightened and knowledgeable on many issues than we are living in what you regard as a developed world. I am not surprised that many of us do not understand the benefits of breastfeeding and how important its for the health of a child. And I am not equally surprised that many of us have little knowledge of many health issues and challenges associated with them in this country.
Did her son have to slap her t*ts around first?
She is most likely teaching her son personally how to please a woman, not only sexually, but also with money and gifts.
I agree with Katsie. I would add that I think It's astonishing that some people are offended by breastfeeding–extended or not. Maybe some people are at odds with the reality of their own biology, with the way God made us, if you will. Breasts are there for the purpose of feeding our offspring, and it's some silly modern fetish that makes this as awkward, embarrassing, or distasteful in our culture. They may as well be offended by pregnancy and childbirth– my, my, how crude and outrageous that we must reproduce in such an animalistic manner!
Whats your age limit on breastfeeding? Youre insane and I dont say that out of fear, i say that bc u r
I'm not offended by a woman breast feeding her child, even at 3 or 4 or 5 years old. And it isn't about breast feeding at all. What offends me is putting a picture of herself on the cover of a national magazine while she does it! Then again, its Time magazine. It's 2012, and anything goes these days. I don't know where or if she works, but another lady in the news today is about a woman fired from her job because she moonlights as an exotic dancer. Will this woman be fired for planting her teats in public for everyone to see(with the kid still holding on).
Maybe those crude folks were breastfed for too long. ;/ Seriously he looks like a leech with his arms dangling down ...Its truly vulgar. Its not the picture of a BABY cuddled up to the mother breastfeeding... that is the image most of us have in our minds. I fear for this child and the bullies that will come in his life because his photo now all over the place. I don't understand why Time and everyone else, didn't blur his picture out to protect this child! I did hear her interview today and apparently they are with their children 24/7 so I assume the children must be home schooled...for their sake I hope they are because they couldn't function in school..they aren't independent enough to do so. I really hope this mom is ready for her kids to live with her the rest of their lives because that is what this attachment parenting is teaching...its such a tragedy for this kids. If they manage to get out on their own I would bet its only after they find someone else to 'attach' too...like she did apparently. I seriously doubt they could even be able to function alone or be happy living alone. Also from the article is sounds like mom and dad have sex with the children in the bed! Surely you don't think that is ok? Why CPS hasn't removed the kids is beyond me...
It could be more dramatic if she was 85 years old and he was 55.
This is really sad when women have to sexualize breast feeding. I'm sure most women are offended by this picture and if not should be. Breastfeeding an infant is a wonderful experience for any mother. This picture is perverted. Shame on the mother in this picture.
The lady is a moron. I thought I could watch the whole interview, but she annoyed me so much I exited and felt compelled to tell everyone how I felt.
I think the woman should breastfeed her kid (if he is 20, who freaking cares), but don't go on the cover of a major magazine and think you are something your not – your not very attractive, your boobs are small, and your kid looks like a freak sucking on them.
Question: why in the world does everything we do have to be made into a big/dramatic story? Lady, shut the He$% up and go ahead and breastfeed your kid in private – we don't want any part of that mess.
Given 65% pf Americans are overweight, why didn't Time pick a more typical American woman? Thrown in a muffin top, a few rolls, and some greasy hair and then EVERYONE would think it's a disgusting cover shot.
And take place in a Walmart! 🙂
Maybe she's thin because she's breast-feeding. Breast-feeding burns up to 500 calories a day, and that's for a baby – bet this kid drinks more than the typical infant.
She's a freak! She and Time magazine just set this poor kid up for a world a bullying when he goes to school.
No doubt this kid will be the laughing stock in town, and also ALL through his school years. I was in the grocery store and two kids around 8-10 years old picked up the Time magazine, looked at it, and were giggling hysterically.
My mom breast-fed all 11 of us until about1 year old, but I think this looks TOTALLY disgusting...
Check on YouTube. In that segment she is laying on her back while her son straddles her chest. It does not say, but she may be milking him rather than the other way around.
That is going to have that child laying on some counselor couch as a man.
Only in 'America' are breast feeding moms considered perverts and child molesters. What gives? What a bunch of ignorant clowns!
You are right! Hitler was breast fed until he was 12 and he had no problems.
LND (who's neither L, N, or D) – what a ridiculous analogy. If Hitler brushed his teeth, are all people who brush their teeth Hitler? Read a book on logic, and lay off the posting in the meantime.
agh. The child will become a MAN oneday...and most likely will press charges on his Mother for expoiting HER "feelings" withthis pic of his mouth on her boob.
I think breast-feeding is juvenile. I outgrew it long ago.
Are you a toddler?
Look at the picture very closely. Is that a dollar bill he is getting ready to stuff in her pants?
Ha when the kid gets bullied he can say "mommy said its fine and im totally normal." im sure bullies will totally respect that (sarcasm).
Yeah, Truth, we should really listen to bullies for moral guidance. Spoken like a true bully.
If that is on the cover what's in the centerfold?
My son is 18 yrs old now,Hale and Healthy, and I Breast fed him for more than 2yrs and there was no harm in it, as he was away from Plastic Feeding Bottles,Pacifiers..which has given him a very unique Immune System...As the reader in the earlier letter said that in Third World Countries where food is expensive so most mothers living below poverty level feel this is the most healthy way to keep your Baby Healthy and fully Fed...and its a safest way to plan your family as it acts as a contraceptive too...
People PLEASE do a search...breastfeeding does NOT keep a woman from getting pregnant. http://www.babycenter.com/404_can-i-get-pregnant-while-breastfeeding_7093.bc (read the comments below the article...this is not a dependable way to prevent another pregnancies) The women in third world countries usually are starving and unable to breast feed their babies for very long at all...then the babies are starving to death. That is why those countries are called third world countries...lack of food, lack of clean water and lack of medical care. Rarely do those children live to be five years old! And you and others think they have a better handle on parenting then we do? These poor souls are struggling to just live! Yes they all sleep together...on the dirt floor in their one room hut! They have no choice. They would like to have their babies live TO parent them. Using the excuse to continue breast feeding an older child just to have a great birth control is just nuts...especially in our first world country when we have so many other ways to prevent pregnancies.
Beam48 – you misread Kausar Karim a little bit. Kausar Karim may have overstated the degree to which lactational amenorrhea leads to temporary infertility in all cases, but no one is arguing that you should breastfeed only to avoid getting pregnant.
When she was married they served watermelon at the reception to keep the flies away from the bride.
So should parents also allow their children to decide what to eat for dinner? Instead of veggies just let the kid eat all the candy and ice cream they want.
False analogy. Candy and ice cream are not equivalent to breast milk.
Seems that the emergence of teeth in the child would be a useful marker.
A three year old has had a set of teeth for quite some time.
Prolonging it so that the mother feels needed is not the goal here.
Teething is sometimes the natural point for weaning. Sometimes not. Again, AP is not suggesting a single model for parenting. Rather, that the needs of the child, and yes, breastfeeding is a need, should be considered.
Hell I'd suck on that too. and I'm 54
I think they are lazy, easier to let him suck than to go make him a sandwich and pour a glass of milk. I have an Aunt who let her kid nurse till he was 4 and he walked up and asked for her boob in front of my Dad one day. He about came unglued. No class. I think they are perverts, she enjoys him sucking, and her husband enjoys watching. Even animals know when to wean their young.
Breastfeeding and eating solid food are not mutually exclusive.
I wonder if she's planning to take the next step when he gets even older - make breast milk cheese.
Cheese omelets for breakfast, cheeseburger for lunch, and au gratin potatoes for dinner, without the stigma.
I assume the kid carries the freaking chair around with him so he can get a bite to eat throughout the day.
At three years old, the kid is eating burgers, fries and a soda – is the breast milk his dessert? What gives? He doesn't need breast milk for sustenance at three. He is doing it because he wants to be coddled/comforted – he better learn now that the world is a he$%hole and that people don't care if he was bottle-fed or breast-fed; but when the picture of him and his mommy show up on Facebook, he will have a tough row to hoe.
The woman stopped breast-feeding at 6 and look what impact that had on her – seems like it kinda messed her up if you ask me.
When is the right time to stop? When she starts getting a rash from the kids beard?
CNN – your sensationalizing something that doesn't matter in 2012. Stupid story.
She has also probably taught him how anal helps constipation.
Call me whatever you want. I have a right to my opinion just like she has a right to plaster this on the cover of Time magazine. I think it is NASTY. It is pandering and screams 'look at me and what I'm doing'.
Im sorry, but this is weird. You have to let your kid be himself. I know a child who breastfed so long that it ruined his dental health. We dont need to let these weird as hell ideas reach everyone. Letting crazy people get media coverage only validates their craziness so that other people can be just as crazy.
Complete crap coming from you.
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As a mother, I would never have my child's face on the cover of a magazine showing me breast feeding him so the world can see and comment on. It's ridiculous. I breast fed my children when they were babies, not preschoolers. But, if that's what you want to do, fine. Just don't make it my business by showing it off to me and everyone else in the world, especially young kids who may be very uncomfortable looking at this cover in the checkout line of the grocery store. I'm sure the boy on the cover will be thanking his mom for this when he's older.
I wonder if she has taught him to enjoy fish, bearded clams and tacos?
I love to breast feed – well, at least go through the motions.
Regardless of what you think of the topic right or wrong that kid is going to get the crap beat out of him until he gets to college and he has his mother's need for public adulation to thank for it.
Does he also feed while she is pole dancing?
It's ok for freaky woman to pull this crap but gay people can't marry each other... welcome to America.
Yes, breast feeding is natural but there are limits as in everything. Intercourse is natural but we frown on 10 year old's doing it. This has the same sort of feeling to me.
I'm sorry...but breast feeding until you are into the toddler stage is disturbing. If you are living in a 3rd world country and its one of the only means of feeding your child? That's one thing...but in this culture...to continue to breastfeed past 1-2 years of age seems to reflect the relationship is more of a sexual issue to the mother than a real need to bond with or feed the child who does not know any better. Its not against the law but I think counseling is certainly in order.
Complete BS. That's your opinion and it's nonsensical.
I breast fed my daughter for 34 months. I had read a Finnish study that said children that are breast fed for at least 2 year very rarely need braces. My daughter's dentist raves about the spacing of her teeth. She has doesn't have to worry about crowding with someher classmates do. The theory is that breast feeding excerzies and builds jaw muscles in a way a bottle doesn't. Babies have to work for breast milk while a bottle is drink or drown.
Not something I would personally do, but it's her decision and everyone should butt out! That's what wrong with society today, everyone thinks their view is the one and only.
Intercourse between 10 year old's, it is natural too. There are limits to everything.
Where does the line form?
Where does breastfeeding stop and incest begin?
Where do thoughtful comments end and perverse fantasies projected onto the world begin?
It is interesting to note that the stranded conquistador Alvar Nunez Cabeza de Vaca as we he made his way through Texas encountered a Native American tribe where children were nursed until the age of 12. The main reason being because food was so scarce.
For those who rush to snap judgment in this comment section:
1. You should really watch the Malveaux interview with Mayim Bialik – Bialik makes a very thoughtful summary of AP.
2. Children who breastfeed beyond infancy also eat solid food. The two aren't mutually exclusive. Most children, if not artificially weaned, will slowly taper off breast milk. Many posters seem to have this idea that toddlers who still breastfeed aren't eating food. Not so.
3. If you don't have children, then what do you know?
4. If you haven't actually read anything on AP, then what do you know? Read a book by Sears. Or at least the introduction.
5. The image on the cover of TIME is sensationalized. This is not what breastfeeding a toddler looks like. This image is misrepresenting the gradual weaning that naturally occurs, and is intended to sell magazines, not accurately convey AP.
It is a sad day when our society has become so medicalized that something as natural as breastfeeding is replaced by formula (expensive and less nutritious) and pathologized. If don't want to or can't breastfeed your child, that's your choice. But who are you to judge mothers who do? Not only is breastfeeding beyond infancy recommended by the WHO and "normal" in most other societies, it is also beneficial for the child. So long as it is mutually acceptable to both mother and child concerned, there is absolutely nothing medically or morally wrong with it. For those who disagree, you are dupes of the biomedical industry. Go run like lemmings to the drug store and ask your doctor about the purple pill. I also have some swamp land I'd like to sell you at a good price.
Sex between children was once acceptable too.
Let me know how your child turns out. When he ends up depressed at age 30 because he cant handle the real world dont say nobody warned you.
popeye1128 – what insightful analysis. Care to cite any sources? Even if what you say were true, the analogy is poor. Just because x was done in the past and is no longer moral doesn't mean that if y was done in the past it is no longer moral. Think a little before you post next. In the meantime, let the grownups talk.
Are you serious? – yes, I am. Try making an argument other than a counterfactual conditional. You might also try reading a little, and not just articles written by people you agree with already.
More power to the mother, I say go for it. It doesn't hurt nobody.
Your english skills prove exactly why it shouldn't be done. Try anybody instead of nobody next time.....ya heardddd
I guess she'll be making her kid PB&J sandwiches until hes 50! Our society is going to helI in a hamdbasket.
Truth – another inept analogy.
Usually oral from a woman stops the day you are married. However, mine has kept going for 4 years like her and her kid. I wonder if we can get on the cover of the magazine?