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May 10th, 2012
04:37 PM ET
Breast-feeding: Too much of a good thing?It's hard to avoid staring at the cover of Time Magazine this week. If you're on social media like Twitter and Facebook, the widely shared image may have arrived on your screen before you ever saw it in the supermarket. The provocative cover shows Jamie Lynne Grumet, a 26-year-old mother from Los Angeles, breast-feeding her son. This isn't your typical mom-and-baby shot: Grumet's son is 3. In case you were wondering, Grumet told CNN's Erin Burnett that her son is actually breast-feeding in that now-iconic image. Grumet said her own mother breast-fed her until age 6, and Grumet still remembers it. "I'm proud of her," Grumet said. The picture promotes an article about the growing popularity of "attachment parenting", a theory first advocated by Dr. Bill Sears and his wife, Martha, in their 1992 best-selling guide “The Baby Book.” The Searses argue that co-sleeping, “baby wearing” (where the baby is attached to the parent with a sling) and extended breast-feeding will help parents respond better to the individual needs of their babies. Celebrities such as Mayim Bialik of "The Big Bang Theory" are also promoting ideas about attachment parenting. Bialik said on Friday that she still breast-feeds her 3-year-old son. "He's not done breast-feeding, and I'm not ready to tell him not to," she said. Many moms and dads have strong opinions about these practices, especially the breast-feeding advice. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends babies be breast-fed exclusively for the first six months of their lives. "We don't all nurse older kids," Bialik said of mothers who subscribe to attachment parenting ideas. "But the notion that a child's voice matters, that every child is different, that's the basis of attachment parenting." Heather Curtis, wife of Fark.com founder Drew Curtis, told CNN's Geek Out that she practiced breast-feeding for an extended period, carried her babies in slings and practiced co-sleeping, as Bialik did. So did Caryn Rogers, a science writer for the Preeclampsia Foundation. "I didn't really choose to eschew conventional care so much as chose to get what I believed was the most evidence-based care," Rogers said. Grumet said that sleeping with her baby does not affect intimacy with her husband. Watch: Breast-feeding cover-mom defends pose "I think intimacy is extremely important in a marriage and I think a strong marriage is going to be a great foundation to show your children how to be raised confident and happy and I had that with my family, too," she said. Time: Extended breast-feeding is more common than we think CNN.com readers expressed mixed views on the subjects of the best age to stop breast-feeding and the appropriateness of the Time cover in general. See what they said. We want to know what you think. Is it OK to breast-feed well past toddler-hood, or is it too much of a good thing? soundoff (3,790 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 Next »Leave a Reply to ValenzMom
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I was breast fed until I was six and I'm perfectly fine at age 45. Now please excuse me, I'm going to go ask if I can take a walk up to the store to buy some candy with my allowance money.
P.S. – MOMMY said I could TYPE this!!!!!
😉
Nice! 😉
Jesus, you had a pervert for a mother.
I too was 6, almost 7, when my mom did the same. But that was in Europe. Here in the USA the problem is nudity. People have a problem with that and run and hide thinking that is a terrible sin. WAR AND MORE KILLINGS is OK in the USA but nothing to do with our bodies and flesh which is natural.
To Martha – Jesus's Mother was a pervert??? Wow where did that come from. I missed that chapter.
It's NOT that the nudity people, it's the fact that the kid can walk up and ask for it – he could also ask for a salad if he needs something nutritional in his diet.
That kids going to get his @ss kicked real soon by his peers, watch.
Yeah because 3 year old kids are all about analyzing the behaviors of their peers and then kicking @ss. When you were 3 you were a sweet little boy who wanted to be close to his mommy, to be loved, and to play with some trucks and dinosaurs.
Now you're trolling for attention on the internet. Think about it.
Not with a hot mommy like that! "Dude can we meet your mom?"
even though I'm over twice her age, I'm wiling for her to adopt (and feed) me.
he should be winking his eye and giving the thumbs up
If a child is able to say that they want to have your "boob"...I think it is time to wean the kid off from it!!
You've voiced an opinion with no reasoning. Thanks?
and...
female teachers have sex with their underage students and some get a pass......
and i bet the boys like that too.
but what effect does this have on the grownup men later?
yes, this is what turned on grown men when they see breasts. Its very hard for them to wane off breasts.
What is on the next issue of Time??? Romney taking a dump? I mean really who cares, its a bodily function, not worthy of a magazine cover... but really the photo is highly erotic, this kid is will have this hanging over him like a dark cloud.
I SO agree with you on the dark cloud thing. This mother, and this almost perverse photo she allowed them to take, is absolutely pathetic. Her poor son... I feel just awful for that little boy and what he is going to be faced with in the years ahead. God help him.
I would not be surprised at all if he grew up with mental disorders, or even turned gay. This poor, poor child. This mother should be ashamed of herself.
Remember that People magazine photo from two months ago of the 4 year old nursing on a bench at Target?
No? Interesting.
In two weeks no one will even remember this.
There is nothing erotic or wrong with the photo or a mother breastfeeding her child. I too was feed the same way until I was almost 7. I lived in Europe then , but this shouldnt matter, the problem is that folks like you find NUDITY as something sinful and pervert. We dont have issues with nudity in Europe but we do have issues with wars and killings which happens too often in the USA yet you are OK with that. That child will be fine. The only problem comes from narrow minded folks like all of you. Women in the USA need to get to know and love their bodies, work out and dont be so darn fat, and enjoy all the benefits of breastfeeding, and having fun in life. Dont compared breast feeding with sex at all. ONLY sick people would think that way. NOBODY in Europe worries so much like you all do when it comes to nudity.
As single male.... I'm still looking for a girlfriend and marry her. I don't my mind if she breastfeeds.
This kid may be '3', but I bet he is sporting a woody.
Exactly. Kids like this do have s e x ual feelings.
I know I am!
This is borderline sexual abuse. If she wants to give her child breast milk, fine, pump and put it in his sippy cup! If the kid was 10 years old and mom was offering her breasts, she would be in jail. She might have fond memories of her mom's boobs, but for other children it could do psychological damage.
Jail for what?!?!? Breastfeeding.
That's like saying a driver should get a ticket for driving 20mph because if they were going 70mph it would be illegal.
Also, you're projecting what you think a 3 year old's world is like. It's common for people without kids to think a child has a much more advanced mental and social structure because they can walk and talk. The reality is they're innocent, naive, and just want to be loved and comforted by their moms. Nursing is a natural part of that.
Child is 3 instead of 10. I was breastfeed until I was 6 yrs old!!! YOur problem is seeing a naked part of the body. NUDITY ISNT A SIN!!
Please explain to me how a woman feeding her baby – which has been practiced as long as there has been babies is sexual abuse??? And why would anyone on the planet care? Unless of course she is trying to feed your child. 🙂 This country gets more messed up by the day. Evel Knievel couldn't make that leap!!
Why doesnt time highlite muff diving in the next issue.
I don't have any kids, so I am speaking as an outsider to the parenting business.
Most of you parents are terrible parents. You should tend to your own kids and let other parents raise theirs.
For example, if you haven't taken your child to the public library or a book store in the last month, you are a terrible parent.
If you have not been inside your child's school in the last month, you are a terrible parent.
If you have not discussed the news with your child in the last month, you are a terrible parent.
sounds like you figured it all out
Ha ha...how pompous of you!
I am a parent. And I think you're right. You can see how defensive people get when they realize they're not caring for their children, but just passing time.
I am fine with what a mother thinks is best for her child, provided she has the child foremost in mind. This "thing" is a SELFISH media greedy short sighted moron. What in the world is that kid going go through when people shove that photo in his face the rest of his life?
The hard copy magazine people get delivered to their home will be in the recycle bin by thened of next week. and unless you go to Times web sight you won't find this article anywhere.
I'm betting that Time will catch some flack for this cover picture.
people have a fear of breasts in this country. Mom's milk beats cow milk for kids any day.
i have no fear bill
I have no problem with breast feeding and think it's great for babies, but I can't help but think that this is detrimental for her son who will have this thrown at him for the rest of his childhood and perhaps haunt him even into adulthood. It surely can't make other children comfortable around him either, especially if he develops the habit, like so many other children that breastfeed at that age, to grasp for the breasts of other women. Additionally, at his age he is old enough to get his nutrition from solid food and I can't see that breastfeeding is of any nutritional benefit.
I've read other comments that have alluded to Americans being the only ones uptight about breastfeeding at this age, which simply isn't true. You're likely to get just as many gasps from the less restrained Europeans. The only place this is even remotely normal is in underdeveloped countries where the mother isn't otherwise able to provide the proper nutrition. Even then she is probably not too healthy herself and unable to produce all the nutrients.
What bothers me the most about the whole thing is her idea of intimacy and family bonding. I don't feel that children sleeping with their parents is a bad thing, but she leads me to believe they conduct their sex life with him in the bed, which I would find very wrong. That, combined with the breast feeding leaves an ugly picture that people should be concerned about.
Seems she got exactly what she wanted out of this, I suppose, I just hope she can accept the repercussions.
I can't believe that just because this mom has decided to breastfeed her child beyond the baby years, you are assuming that she is having sex with her husband with the child in the same bed. That kind of thinking is very disturbing!
Isabel, read the article. That seems to be what it's alluding to –
Grumet said that sleeping with her baby does not affect intimacy with her husband.
"I think intimacy is extremely important in a marriage and I think a strong marriage is going to be a great foundation to show your children how to be raised confident and happy and I had that with my family, too," she said.
Her son wil be fine so you dont worry. YOu are the one with issues when it comes to nudity...any nudity. I was breastfeed until I was 6 yrs old and I am a very happy young woman. THE USA thinks nudity is a sin and women have to make love with the lights out.
We may or may not agree with the breastfeeding practice, however, the problem with this entire thing is how it was delivered by the magazine. The layout, the posing of both Mom and child....just way too much. I have seen bigger kids being breastfed but none of the way this Mom posed and I think it's very irresponsible of the magazine. I'm sure they have other creative people who could have presented or delivered this entire thing the proper way.
There's nothing wrong with the layout. What's wrong is this country's and the new media's obsessions.
I heard that the world average is 4 years. W T F is wrong once again with this country. Fortunately religion for the first time in a long time doesn't seem to be involved since I guess God through Man's written word in the Bible doesn't discuss it?
What I got out of this article is that most of us need to start minding our own business and stop worrying about what other people do with their lives and families.
...and imho this includes family planning, contraception, Planned Parenthood, and equal rights for jobs and marriage regardless of who or what defines you. (But this does not include other animals–since that keeps being introduced by the idiots among us.)
When you post your son in this kind of position on the front page for all to see, you are throwing your business out for all to judge. It goes beyond simple breastfeeding. I think that this fact is what bothers most people.
I can picture all the perverts salivating at this picture...and I bet the Mom can too and is getting a thrill out of the idea.
I agree. Maybe her husband is not good at sucking her t i t s.
The majority of negative responses are coming from six groups:
1. American mothers who didn't really want to be moms and went to work after having their baby as soon as possible. They now feel defensive about not doing the best for their child.
2. American mothers who gave in to peer pressure from others, like the people who are posting negatively here. They now feel defensive about not doing the best for their child.
3. American mothers who had some problem while nursing and stopped because they listened to an American doctor who was clueless and more worried about avoiding lawsuits than encouraging someone to persist through something difficult.
4. American males who think that breasts are for having sex with. They are critical of any living thing touching a breast because it is not them.
5. People who just need attention and post whatever they can to get a response.
I'm not sure you'll appreciate actually looking up world wide breastfeeding practices. Don't mean to burst your bubble, but there is no magic westernized country where this is practiced on a regular basis.
I don't belong to any of those groups.
You might this interesting... http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detwean.html
OK
NEXT
Looks like the kid should miss a couple of servings.
Somebody check how wet she is in her panties:)
I think if she weren't a babe then it wouldn't be as big a deal.
I have been feeling a little bit detached lately. Is there a recommended therapy for my condition?
http://www.salon.com/2012/05/11/time_magazines_breast_feeding_cover_star_is_he_doomed/
"... The complicated reality is that our experiences are entangled with those of our loved ones. A woman should have every right to write and talk and present herself to the world. But if we’re going to talk about our lives, there’s no way we won’t be bringing our families along for the ride. That’s not automatically a traumatic thing. If a child, like Grumet’s, grows up in a family that’s very open about itself, and the child’s own nature is of that bent, he may well think nothing of it. The hang-up isn’t his; it’s the journalists transferring their own discomfort onto him. To assume he’ll be mocked about that Time cover is to assume that the image of him breast-feeding is something to be embarrassed about, that there’s something inherently wrong about it. [...]
On Facebook Thursday, Grumet wrote that “My mother posed for similar images (not as big as TIME obviously) and was a public advocate of breastfeeding. I am so proud of her and loved my upbringing.” So why would her son’s future mortification be a fait accompli? ..."
Next time cover will be a father showering with his 10 year old daughter, after all nudity is natural and cleanliness is good for a child....right??
I knew a family that showered together.
damn good point well made, I have no doubts that this will lead to dads showering with their 10 year old daughters, thats so damn true. loved your comment.
In Florida there are nudist / naturist housing developments where not only families with children but entire communities are nude 24 / 7. It's completely legal, and the housing prices are quite high due to the heavy demand. Best example is Pasco County, Florida.
Dont compared breastfeeding a child who is 3 yrs old with a father showering with his daughter who is 10!! YOu have a sick mind and see nudity , any, as a sinful act. ONLY in your mind. that is what is so sick about the USA. But you cheer when killing do happens and wars occurs and nations are invaded. But you get sick when a mother is feeding her 3 yrs old. BTW I was breastfeed until I was almost 7!! There is nothing wrong with that.
I draw the line when they start shaving.
mom or the kid?
That's one SICK woman
I say, to each their own. In most countries this is perfectly normal and it's American who are in the minority.
Hopefully she will draw the line when the kid's hard on starts sticking her tummy.
Please, I'm begging you, lets forget about this creep that forced her young boy to put his mouth on a private part of an adult to show to the world, knowing full well that there's going to be another adult who is going to take pleasure of seeing a young boy with his mouth on someone's "privates", as thats what that image looks like to me, of whats going to become of this. I used to be able to handle images on Time magazine like bloody war heroes, holocaust victims, or buddihist setting themselves on fire in protest, but now you've involved a innocent young boy who thinks this is healthy normal behavior to have someone take a picture of him doing a lewd act regardless if its his mom or not. Please don't find enjoyment in this, or feel like you have to be mother of the year and continue this "feeding" at his age. Please don't give your money to anyone in exchange for this magazine.
YOu must be crazy and for sure hate nudity. There is NOTHING wrong with this article or the mother breast feeding her child. SO dont compared that with a lewd act or a stranger. THis is a wonderful article. ONLY in the USA people like you prefer wars and killing over NUDITY. That is your problem. Europeans are way ahead of us for a reason.
The sad thing about this whole attachment parenting is that "attachment" is an important milestone in a child's development. A secure attachment with at least one caregiver during early childhood is predictive of many positive social-emotional outcomes later as a child and adult. One of the parenting behaviors that most positively contributes to a secure attachment includes being a parent who is autonomy promoting- letting the child be independent, do things for themselves, etc. Breastfeeding beyond the first year or so and being so enmeshed with a child is not seen by most developmentalists as fostering a healthy sense of dependence. Unfortunately much of some parent's sense of self esteem is woven up with how "competent" they are as a parents and it is also one of the reasons why they seek perfection as parents and drive their children to live up unreasonable expectations for performance in preschool and beyond- Their power and sense of being loved also comes so deeply from their child. They may be doing more harm to their child in the long run- just like in finance- a good portfolio is a diversified one- so a good parent is one who has a balanced life of work, parenting, and leisure. Attachment parenting does not support a balanced life for the parent and certainly not for a child seeking independence and power of their own.
Catherine, what a great post. I tend to be more vulgar but I was kind of thinking the same. At some point couldn't she find another way to bond?
Next phase of Attachment Parenting: Stepfathers washing 5 year old girl's p u s s i e s .
– Have own chair, willing to relocate!
Just listening to this woman makes you realize how DUMB she is. She is the dumb republican blond damsel in distress type.
Pedophiles LOOOOOOOVE this picture.
Another creep who made millions selling books that does damage to society.
I breast fed my child til he was just under a year. But only once or twice a day at that point. When my child was eating table food, he did not need to the boob any more – nature way of saying he more solid food. There are ways of emotionally and intelligently bonding with your children when they are young, without them walking up and asking to nurse. The picture makes me a little nauseous – and I am pretty open-minded.
My hart goes out to this child.......this photo will follow him to his grave.......just think what the press would do if he ever ran for public office........so sad.......
Boycott Time magazine
WHY??? Nothing wrong with breastfeeding. But you do have an issue with nudity. YOu prefer war and killing over a naked body.
This normal, natural mammal behavior. Much more natural than drinking canned powder mix from a rubber tip, or most of the processed foods people feed their kids. Definitely more natural behavior than drinking milk from a cow's udder.
Is it more natural then going to the bathroom, after all... then when "nature calls"
I think the question on everyones minds is whether the tanning mom still breast feeds. Now there's a magazine cover.
This is what BFing should be like. It sickens me to hear people judging others so harshly. It is a really sad state when our society thinks that such judgmental and hateful comments are okay. Shouldn't we all be trying to support each other and ensure that the next generation is raised happy, healthy, and well adjusted?
http://www.drmomma.org/2009/07/breastfeeding-in-land-of-genghis-khan.html.
I think breastfeeding is a private matter. It's not the general public's business if some mothers/children choose to breastfeed more or less than 6-months.
NO true. You must fee your child when he/she is hungry. YOu cant control that if you are traveling or at the park. There is NOTHING wrong with a naked breast. ONLY people like you have problems. Bet you are ok with killings and invading other nations and war.
wow! it's like watching a (miniature) man sucking on his mother's breast. Gross. make that Gross x 10.
As a woman who grew up in Europe and was breastfeed until I was almost 7 I see nothing wrong at all with this image. ONLY in the USA would there be issues when nudity is involved. THis child will be fine in life later on. Only SICK and narrow minded people like so many of you have issues. Why dont you worry more about wars, police abuse, and children in the USA killing other children? Nudity is part of life and nature. Get over your puritan ways. And dont travel to Germany, France, Spain, Italy or other southern nations or you may be shocked of all the beautiful slim white naked women at the beaches and lakes. USA women worry more about keeping your hubby happy by staying in shape and losing 80 lbs of fatness. THis mother knows what is best for her son same way my mother knew and most mothers in Europe. An open breast is not a sinful act.
Nature should and does tell you when to stop breast feeding....We call them teeth...
And nature tells mothers that while there is milk in the breast is OK to feed the too.
I have breast fed all four of my children. I would like to promote it as a natural choice for mothers. However, I don't understand why Time did that cover. To me, that was exploitation... That child for instance will one day have to deal with it and secondly, why did it have to show a naked breast. I did nurse in public, but it was always under a blanket. I wouldn't want my son to see someone nursing and exposing themselves. Be modest, not ashamed.