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May 3rd, 2012
11:00 AM ET
PE: The 'other' male sexual problemIan Kerner, a sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author, blogs about sex weekly on The Chart. Read more from him on his website, GoodInBed.
We take it for granted, but the little blue pill has drastically changed the way we think about erectile disorder (ED). Once known as “impotence,” ED was originally thought to be caused by anxiety, nerves, or low self-esteem; now it’s commonly known to be a health issue that hinges on the flow of blood to the penis and taking a pill to deal with the issue is often no big deal. Don’t get me wrong: this is not to say that Viagra and its brethren – Levitra, Cialis and the new FDA-approved Stendra – are the be-all end-all, or even that they’re unequivocally effective. It’s just that these medications have helped to spur a national dialogue (and often a debate) that has changed the way we think about sexual problems. But now that ED has come out of the shadows, what about the other major male sexual issue — premature ejaculation (PE)? Most still think of PE as a function of psychology or behavioral conditioning, rather than physiology and neurochemistry. For example, many wrongly assume that:
But in my professional work, I’ve observed that men who struggle with PE don’t do anything differently than men who don’t have the problem. They don’t masturbate differently; they don’t have different psychological issues; they don’t approach sex differently. Much like a predisposition toward right-handedness, premature ejaculators are often just born that way. Fortunately, PE is increasingly recognized as a health issue, and this is a relief to those men who struggle with it and can’t help but ask themselves: What’s wrong with me? As with the little blue pill, the pharmaceutical industry has been on the hunt for a PE drug. Just as the discovery of Viagra was somewhat of an accident (its erectile-enhancing qualities were only discovered after the drug was being developed as a potential heart medication), it’s been observed that certain SSRI-based medications can delay ejaculation. Ironically, what is a sexual side-effect to many may actually be a sexual boon to the man who suffers from PE, and so some doctors will prescribe the off-label use of an SSRI to help manage the condition. One drug – Priligy – is a short-acting selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor that is being marketed in parts of Europe as a premature ejaculation pill, but it has not yet received FDA approval here in the U.S.. Another medication potentially awaiting FDA approval is PSD502, a topical numbing agent that can be applied to the penis to decrease penile sensitivity. The use of such numbing agents as a treatment for PE dates back to 1943, but these products have had their limitations.
Still, those behind PSD502 claim to have developed a formula that doesn’t suffer from many of these drawbacks. Like Priligy, PSD502 is not yet available, but a very similar product has been FDA-approved based on a pre-existing monograph. Dubbed Promescent, this product carries many of the same benefits of PSD502 and effectively decreases penile sensitivity without transmitting any numbness to a man’s partner. But as helpful as a product like Promescent can be, I still counsel men to focus first on partner-communication, as well as “sex scripts” that de-emphasize intercourse while vouchsafing female pleasure – both of which I discuss exhaustively in my e-book, “Overcoming Premature Ejaculation.” From there, many men who suffer from PE may find that they still need to pursue a broader “biopsychosocial” approach: one that combines behavioral, medical, and interpersonal approaches. In the absence of a single “silver bullet” to do away with PE, it’s often necessary to do a little bit of everything. Let’s not wait for the next blockbuster drug to arrive in order to have a meaningful, well-informed conversation about PE. It may never come, but the conversation should. soundoff (1,160 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 Next »Leave a Reply to Camper Repairs Near Me
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Given the ease with which the average person can rattle off brand names like “Viagra” and “Cialis,” or joke about “four hour erections,” it would seem that erectile-dysfunction drugs are just about as common as ibuprofen.
I would think that rubbing on the numbing cream may lead to ejaculation.
Not if you have your mom do it.
When I want to discuss this problem..the woman says.."Here..let me give you a hand..a reach around..anything..use your tongue...do me!..Do me like your brother does..& the mailman."
JB, I almost had a stroke I'm laughing so hard
JB, I'm with Mark – almost died I was laughing so hard. Thanks for the early morning laugh, ha ha ha!!!
JB, OUTSTANDING answer! – I fell out of my chair!
good one, JB
You rubbed it on the wrong head!
I don't take with medically treating PE, but I don't think it is exactly a "heatlh issue" in the sense that there is anything abnormal or wrong with it. It's evolutionary benefits are obvious: If a male ejaculates first then quits, no problem; the opposite is a big problem though. I would also be surprised if the actual number of men who this affects isn't MUCH greater than one-third.
Yes. Thanks for having some common sense about this!
You are exactly correct. PE is an evolutionary advantage: passing on your genes as fast as possible before the opportunity is lost. Then you can think about having fun.
Actually, you are wrong. A woman is far more likely to get preganant if she too has an orgasm. Her muscle contractions help the little swimmers get to their destination.
There is a big evolutionary disadvantage. Women don't like it. You will pass those genes on once, word will get around and you will not get another shot. Also, the idea that it is better than the opposite shows you do not understand the female body. Men are 'done' when we orgasm, but women are just getting started.
Teacher, I have a question.... Won't evolution take care of women that don't orgasm quick and often and those that don't have strong contractional muscles, as well as those men that don't PE? Doesn't evolution suggest a future world of rabbit like sexual intercourse?
There's been an over the counter drug I've been using heavily for years to treat this. It's called alcohol, and it works – every time.
practice makes perfect
I am a 65 year old male and I have just developed this minuteman syndrome. I thought the opposite was supposed
to happen as I aged. Maybe it is natures way of saying, "Hurry up old man. You're going to run out of steam!"
I'm 67. Think about how many more times you can do it than the rest of us who exhaust ourselves working so hard and long to get there. You still have tons of energy left for many more in each session ! Lucky you !
Just be thankful you are in a situation to have that problem. I'm in my mid-40s and been celibate the entire time ... I would say not by choice but it is really by responsible choice ... because I could leave my wife but I can't leave my kids. Sucks to be me, lol
I don't really need to hear about 65 or 67 year old men having sex. Be glad you're still alive.
xab, you can go on and retch all you want. Truth of the matter is that a lot of us old donks who take care of ourselves can go on long & hard (HEHE).
Why would u wanna wait forver to have an orgasm just to wait till your woman has one? PE isn't YOUR problem-it's HERS. She needs to "let the fingers do the walkin' in the yellow pages" if she wants to "connect"...LOL!
you made me pee my pants.
So why is it my problem you can't maintain? If you can't even do it alone, why do I need to find your number in the yellow pages. Oh hand me my glasses so I can see the fine print!
Why do it with a woman if you don't care about her pleasure? Just shut the door and have at it yourself.
How old are you? Grow up and be a man if you're going to read articles about men's sexual health!
It's called mutual satisfaction and part of a committed relationship. If you think it's "HER" problem then you're going to be lucky if a woman ever lets you near where "her fingers do the walkin'".
Y'know, even if you aren't interested in your partner's pleasure, prolonging ejactulation can be its own reward by allowing you to lingering with the pleasurable sensations of the journey !
corrected: Y'know, even if you aren't interested in your partner's pleasure, prolonging ejaculation can be its own reward by allowing you to linger with the pleasurable sensations of the journey !
A little red pill that will allow men to keep going for hours will be a boon to the emergency room as they find that going that long without stopping rubs the skin OFF. And man...it hurts. But that's not something a PE sufferer would know about lol
What is "erectile disroder"? Ha ha!
Bahhh, haha....good one argle bargle
Way too much attention focused on a man's ability or inability to perform.
I'm with you Katie. Good lord. Is sex all people care about? If your older and have ED it's probably because you are old and that is NOT a medical condition. If you have PE it could be because sex is all you think about and in that case you should get professional psychiatric help before you go off and rape someone. Also with so much obsession over sex does the word PERVERT even exist anymore?
I just learned that "You pervert" is two words. I thought it was spelled "eupervert" and meant something along the lines of "Oh my God, that's wonderful."
Meanwhile you both still came here to read all about it...the subconscious is a funny thing..
The fact that so many here are using this forum to try out for the Improv is deplorable. As a Urologist specializing in sexual medicine it is this type of thinking that make men suffer in silence. Especially the idiots who say it is strictly a mental thing. There are numerous physiological conditions that bring about a PE syndrome. PSD502 looked like a wonderful alternative but could not make it through FDA approval, Dapoxatine is a per episode SSRI's with less side effects but also not available in the U.S. Right now Promescent is clearly the best option and hopefully more options will become available.
Well Dr. Bob how many people do you know intimately and or sexually who have PE? I speak from experience. You called people idiots when they said it was a mental issue but then you say there are numerous psychological issues that bring on PE. I'm sure some patients aren't telling you that sex is all they think about or how many times a day they whack off because you as a doctor should know that patients don't tell you everything. Also, I'm sure you know the risks associated with using these medicines and the veneral diseases that are helped being spread by them. Also are you a Promescent spokesperson trying to push for sales?
Well Dr. Bob how many people do you know intimately and or sexually who have PE? I speak from experience. You called people idiots when they said it was a mental issue but then you say there are numerous psychological issues that bring on PE. I'm sure some patients aren't telling you that sex is all they think about or how many times a day they whack off because you as a doctor should know that patients don't tell you everything. Also, I'm sure you know the risks associated with using these medicines and the veneral diseases that are helped being spread by them. Also are you a Promescent spokesperson trying to push for sales?
Physiological and psychological are two different words with 2 very different meanings, Anna...
reading fail...
think-then-reply fail...
post-twice fail...
Having been a minuteman since puberty I can say that this is a problem and should not be joked about. Yes after ejaculation the first time I was able to "last". I am now 58 and found the solution many years after a divorce and open heart surgey about the same time. It's called low dose paxil, I was put on it due to anxiety and after one week on 5mg daily I was a stud!! I could last 30 minutes to and hour. THis drug has changed my life in many ways besides the PE problem and I know many don't like the drug due to withdrawl but I never plan to get off it. I understand there was a study of it for PE with less than 5mg per week. if you have PE I would ask my doc about it because anythings worth not having to feel shamed by PE!!!
P.S. for all you jokers I can only hope "what goes around comes around!"
As someone who suffered with this for YEARS and lost a marraige because of it, it is a real problem. No physical intimacy will kill a marraige. I searched for a "cure" and finally got put on a low dose of paxil by a sympathetic urologist. I works fantastic. My current wife is a very happy woman 🙂
Anna is angry because she never has any fun...
Has there been any investigation into Prolactin for the treatment of PE?
isay that if that happen to you that give you more of a chance totry to have another one
The "other" male sexual problem? Marriage.
The man who is self-controlled enough to just pleasure himself and focus on his career will avoid a lot of these issues, including ED, PE, sexual frustration, involuntary celibacy, cheating, alimony, child support.
...you forgot children and mother in laws!
I was hoping the "other" male problem discussed in this article is the one I have: It takes *forever* to get "there". No issues with stamina or being hard as a rock, but getting "there" is very difficult. At some point it just gets tiring and is as much a stress in my love life as any of these other problems are for other people.
If you're having ED, have yourself checked out by a cardiologist (it's a sign of hardening of the arteries) and also checked f diabetes.
find a reasonable MD and try lexapro. older SSRI not so great for depression but works for PE. i have not experienced any other side effects other than you cant stop taking cold turkey without withdrawl
The other male sexual problem... know you know this one... kid comes home from a night out and his father asks him "How did it go?" - then a few nights later the kid is staying home and his dad asks him "Are you going out tonight? – Kid says no – why?
When the woman is satified first or mutually with forplay,, I like it only to last a minute or so..... Viagra makes marathon sex and that is really is not so great.
God bless america. We can't cure cancer or diabetes or anything important, but if you're a male AND YOUR DICK DOESN'T WORK?!?!?! Well we've got 15 drugs for you, and we're working hard to develop two dozen more.
WE know what's important! Giant FU to the rest of the planet. GO USA!
If your dick doesn't work, why do you want to live forever???
So the doc wants to "start a conversation". Does he expect people to get together and sit around and talk about this?
cayenne pepper ,L-arginine, ginseng,hulled pumpkin seeds (for testosterone),Vitamin E and ZINC is the way to go. trust me.
Is that a dip, a soak, or a salve?
Back in the 60's when I was stationed in Thailand and Viet Nam, we used right guard,, (just had to becareful to hold your prvt down) while spraying.... it worked great... it was cheap, made you smell nice..... only the short time girls didn't like it... LOL
I was watching Dr. Oz 2 weeks ago (the show dedicated to 50 shades of grey) and they recommended Promescent. My husband odered it and we tried it Friday night. It was a very welcome addition to our lovemaking. My husband said he had no thoughts of changing positions or making sure he lasted long enough and it increased his enjoyment, I know it increased mine.......LOL This author mentioned it as well ,what is the PSD502 he was talking about? I told my husband to order more of the Promescent because anything featured on Oz is usualy out of stock withn a week but it sounds like Psd502 is similar.
PE can be a problem, but believe it or not NOT being able to finish the act for a long time can be equally problematic, because as much as we might like to joke about erections lasting for hours, we always assume that a successful climax is part of the package. I don't know how common it is among men that they might have this problem... long erections, enjoyable sex, but MUCH delayed ejaculation, or the woman calling a halt to a marathon session... or the man just finally realizing that while it's fun, the climax isn't going to happen. There are times PE sounds great.
What if you include all the hours you think about getting it as part of the act?
To be able to evacuate ones's bowels rapidly, eat while traveling, maintain an omnivorous diet, sleep with one eye open and spread one's seed promptly are all survival traits that should be honored.
are u aware that hispanics make up almost 60% of the child support cases in Texas? You may want to rethink the last part of your statement and encourage younger guys to focus on school instead.
To Baldheaded Guy: Why did you bring up the topic of Hispanics? My name? I'm 100% Northern European. Education? Graduate degrees. Also making mirth of these adaptive behaviors.
You? 1) racist? 2) no sense of humor? 3) Severe?
Baldheaded Dude-Do you realize that the Hispanics among us who appreciate the invention of condoms have WAY MORE FUN THAN YOU???
This stuff better not be free or covered by health insurance. But as the ins. executives are 99% men and they have PE, you can bet that it will be free. Pr*cks.
The real simple solution to this problem is to wear a condom.
I am a PE and I don't care. Sex is like golf. You don't have to be good at it to enjoy it. In the end I am just dissapointing a woman. Big deal
its a big deal to some men if the woman is snickering behind his back to other women. regardless, women have a way of making men feel inadequate in most areas of life, and this is no exception.
You're an ass.
Wham Bam Thank you Maam. I got to watch the game. I don't need no pill.
My husband lasts soooo much longer - quite long enough for my pleasure - if I just make sure we have sex at least once a day. If we ladies made sure our men were not walking around with their pumps fully primed, there'd be less to pump and it would take longer to pump it. Think about it. Do your man more often, and he lasts longer. WIN for everyone!
thanks sir....i mean "ma'am"
I think you may be on to something. My wife and I normally have sex daily. I never have problems with PE. But if I am out of town for a week on business, I don't last 30 seconds the first time we have sex when I return. Masturbation does not help. It is nice but not the same.
When I was a teenager my doctor decided i had "anxiety" and put me on Paxil. I noticed It literally took all my effort to ejaculate and it made my girlfriend self conscious because she thought she was doing something wrong. There were a few times where we literally had to stop and I had to say sorry, I just cant make it happen. If you ever suffer from PE, try Paxil...
never suffered from PE, but I didn't like Paxil for the same reason. what a cruel joke, fix your depression, but you can't have an orgasm.
No problems in either department here. Keigels work.
I have found that most men will win the race against a 3 minute egg timer, then roll over and go to sleep. And it gets even worse after they think they own you. I disagree with something in this article. Men have sex with a woman much like they were masturbation as if in a hurry to get it over with. Too bad. oth partners are deprived.
what do you offer him during the act besides just lying there?
Perhaps I can treat you for this personal problem.
Really? Well then you are picking the wrong guys. From my perspective, it isn't all that great if she doesn't get hers first. Her getting hers first usually means there is seconds and thirds too ... bonus! Maybe it's because I'm a little older, in my mid forties, but I think I might have more fun making sure she is satisfied than satisfying my own needs.
... and what kind of guy do you pick that thinks they can 'own' a woman? Wow! Isn't a relationship a partnership?
This is NOT a "health issue". There's nothing wrong, other than "shorter pleasure period," with PE. This is just an attempt to:
1. Convince the public that this is an issue
2. Sell a product to treat the "problem"
In other words, this is about money.
premature according to whom?
I'm sorry but I just don't see the value anymore of the average, non-famous, non-rich, man getting married, dating, or even having intercourse with all the new modern pressures these days. american men are constantly being belittled by the media, women and society in general. most men, even those who date gorgeous women, are anal, or at the very least, unhappy, and insecure, and IT SHOWS in public. I have had a HUGE burden lifted off of me since my divorce with no pressure of dating or being in a relationship. I am on cloud nine having solo sex and exploring what turns ME on instead of having to always worry about if i am adequate to my partner. Any solution that requires a pill spells trouble in the short and long term. people need to focus on what really matters to them and not be afraid to embrace it. Truste me, you will be FAR happier on a daily basis.
Good God!! As if watching ads for Viagra and Cialis isn't bad enough, they're going to come out with a drug for PE. Great! Terrific! I'll love having the kids and grandkids in while we're watching the evening news. WOn't they love hearing about some guy's PE problems?? And how to fix it with the magic pill?? Viagra and Cialis always seem to be the main commercial event during the nightly news (What would Huntley and Brinkley say? LOL) Yeah, I guess that says something about the state of our society..... (and that ain't no compliment, folks.)
Time to turn your TV off!
I fail to see how this is a problem. 30 seconds...I can go to sleep. What's the issue?
Is PE really a "health" issue? It seems to me to be part of biology for a male of any species to ejaculate quickly in order to increase the odds of reproduction. PE is more of a pleasure issue.
Chris, I believe studies also show that women are more likely to get pregnant if they were really aroused during sex. They are also more likely to have sex multiple times with a man who pleases them. So 'being a good lover' also plays a role in whose genes get passes on.
Robert, I disagree. Some women really enjoy intercourse. Its the only kind of pleasure that 'does it' for them. For some women, foreplay is nice, but still just foreplay. Having their partners last long enough for mutual pleasure is a real issue, not a made up money maker.
If you have this problem, take a Viagra, get one of those "four hour erections" and go for it. Problem solved.
Right on. Take the little blue pill, let nature take its course with the first one, but you'll be ready for the second in less than 10 minutes and good for a long time the second time around.
Hey, my tongue still works.. i keed i keed
The survey says:
Thanks for the story, and the comments. Where else can you get the scientific/medical info you need, along with the the bathroom graffiti from school days?!
I think Mark Twain said something about ways and means, when a man has the ways he does not have the means, and when he has the means he does not have the ways.....
The over the counter drug pseudoephedrine hydrochloride is an SSRI that will keep you going for an hour. Most of the heartburn pills will also delay things. Personally I am a big fan of female foreplay to (multiple) climaxes. Then there is no need to work long and hard or take drugs.
Taking SSRI's are no joke there's way more side effects than just making it harder/impossible to finish. SSRI's I think will eventually be banned when a better treatment is discovered and when we look back in 50 years we'll be like I can't believe we used to prescribe those to so many people.
How about doing something for men that have Peyronies disease. It gets to about 1-2% of men and has been around a long time. Never see anything about it. check google if you don't know what it is , and hope you never get it.
"Low serotonin levels" are well established as the primary neurochemical cause for premature ejaculation. Deferol capsules solve this problem with any numbing.
It depends on yer partner @ foreplay. I.m 73. aqnyhow drink 6 beers and u can maintain.she:ll be asking u to COMEONMAN!!!~
this is really comical, i can't wait until someone has to go get the PE drug and look the pharmacist in the face. i was like how is Physical Education a problem??