home
RSS
Too young to know your gender?
The story of 11-year-old Tammy who was born a boy and is now living as a girl sheds some light on the issue of childhood transgender issues
September 27th, 2011
12:36 PM ET

Too young to know your gender?

Comments of the morning:

“I applaud these parents for loving their child for who she is and allowing her to find herself rather than forcing her to suppress all of her feelings and be ‘normal.’" - WowMe

“If God wanted him to be her, God would of created you as such. Going against Gods word is dangerous!” - The9thSeal

Little boy lives as little girl

Hindered by a speech impediment, it wasn’t until age 3 that Thomas Lobel, by learning sign language, could communicate with his parents and the first thing he told them was that he was a girl. Eight years later, Thomas now goes by Tammy and lives as a girl, a process that has been difficult for her parents; the balance of supporting their child and taking criticism from family and friends can be painful and confusing.

So what do CNN.com readers think about their decision to support Tammy’s wishes to live as a girl? Some said they fully support it, while others said that, among other things, Tammy is too young to fully understand gender.

bojimbo261 said, “Children know more than adults do.”

flipnap2112 said, “I am a 42-year-old man. Some of the ways I acted and dressed would have had these adults convincing me I’m transgender. But back then my parents just laughed, didn’t assign a thing to my behavior and I grew up as normal as one can. I’m as heterosexual as one can get. Why are you doing MRIs and brain scans. They’re kids!”

khadija60 said, “People don't realize that forcing boys into the Rambo mode and girls into the Barbi mode is extremely destructive. I know men who cook and sew and women who can change an engine. It doesn't mean they are gay or lesbian. People should just lighten up.”

Mijan said, “And some gay men are extremely masculine, rough, and tough. Some lesbians are extremely feminine and delicate. Some people are androgynous. One of my straight guy friends loves to bake, knit, sew, and wear kilts... but he's absolutely straight. And (as I was in the Army) I know a lot of straight women who are extremely rugged and tough. Let people be who they are! Boys will be boys, except when boys will be girls, and that shouldn't be a problem, because that's just how people are.”

MeNMine said, “I think that most of the problem comes simply in perception. Tammy likes to wear dresses and do other things that girls want to do. But no amount of artificial hormones or surgeries is going to make him a girl. He is a boy, who just happens to enjoy and associate more with stereotypical ‘girl’ responses. I think the problem is that Tammy and those around him feel like they need to change who he is (by taking hormones and possible future surgeries making his body feel more feminine) so that he can fit in.”

VinoBianco said, “Transgender people are a real thing. It doesn't mean they were abused or are ‘sick’ – the science on this is still being discovered but you can have the mind of one gender and the body of another. Why can't we just accept that? These kids have to go through too much confusion to have to deal with the ignorant judgments of society.”

And readers debated the parents, a lesbian couple’s influence:

lamponhill said, “Funny that this boy who thinks he is a girl has two moms! Has anyone thought that he identifies with women because he doesn't have a male to identify with? Sad that he doesn't have a father.”

gimmetheax responded, “Funny that some commenters haven't noticed that he has two brothers who are very ‘masculine’ and who, coincidentally, ALSO have two moms....”

NCCallie said, “I'd like to applaud Pauline and Debra. You have obviously struggled to make very difficult choices and have focused on what is best for Tammy. I think it is encouraging to see that two people can love a child so much that they put her needs first-ahead of society's perceptions and bigotry. Tammy is lucky to have you as her parents.”

bamagrad03 said, “So they let this kid call the shots when it was 3 years old...that's great parenting right there.”

kakash responded, “When it comes to something as traumatic as gender identity disorder then you're damn right the kid has to be involved if not in charge of the decision. This isn't about doing homework or bedtimes. It's about the child's mental health. It isn't a parenting issue.”

EricaWIP33 said, “I was born a boy...I transitioned into a woman only recently, but I have known since I was four years old that I was a girl. The only reason I didn't do it before was because of a world that was so cold and uncaring, and social stigma that went along with it. That, and at age 10 my father told me to either get happy being a boy, or get busy finding a new place to live. If only my parents were as accepting as Tammy's are, then maybe I would have enjoyed my childhood more.”

Do you feel your views align with these commenters' thoughts? Post a comment below or sound off on video

Compiled by the CNN.com moderation staff. Some comments edited for length or clarity.


soundoff (617 Responses)
  1. restaurants near me now

    Next time I read a blog, Hopefully it won't fail me as much as this one. After all, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought you would probably have something helpful to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could possibly fix if you weren't too busy searching for attention.

    https://www.twingotuningforum.de/safelink.php?url=https://ocrvluxurycoaches.com

    June 13, 2021 at 19:33 | Report abuse | Reply
  2. funeral homes near me

    bookmarked!!, I love your site!

    https://www.furrondy.net/Redirect.aspx?destination=http://campervanrepairshop.com/

    June 13, 2021 at 20:23 | Report abuse | Reply
  3. zaxby's near me

    http://www.cambridgediscoverypark.net/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=hitch-works.com

    June 13, 2021 at 20:45 | Report abuse | Reply
  4. cigar shop near me

    http://rayhunter.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=immigrants.co

    June 13, 2021 at 21:03 | Report abuse | Reply
  5. tattoo shop near me

    Having read this I thought it was rather informative. I appreciate you spending some time and energy to put this content together. I once again find myself personally spending a lot of time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it!

    https://doterra.myvoffice.com/Application/index.cfm?&EnrollerID=604008&Theme=Default&ReturnUrl=https://www.masternearme.com

    June 14, 2021 at 00:16 | Report abuse | Reply
  6. land for sale near me

    http://dailygood.org/more.php?op=get&url=https://www.hitch-works.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 00:29 | Report abuse | Reply
  7. fabric stores near me

    https://how2power.com/pdf_view.php?url=https://www.socallandscapers.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 00:42 | Report abuse | Reply
  8. laundromat near me

    http://www.webourgeon.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://www.forkliftrentalorangecounty.com

    June 14, 2021 at 00:55 | Report abuse | Reply
  9. salon near me

    Excellent blog post. I definitely appreciate this website. Keep writing!

    http://meetme.com/apps/redirect/?url=http://www.incomewolf.com

    June 14, 2021 at 04:43 | Report abuse | Reply
  10. waterfalls near me

    http://www.cia.org.ar/BAK/bannerTarget.php?url=www.nearmyspot.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 06:30 | Report abuse | Reply
  11. furniture near me

    Aw, this was an exceptionally good post. Taking the time and actual effort to produce a great articleÖ but what can I sayÖ I hesitate a whole lot and never seem to get anything done.

    https://ww17.acconsthost.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://beachedbabiesswimwear.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 06:52 | Report abuse | Reply
  12. breakfast restaurants near me

    http://www.lifestream.tv/players/mocd.php?c=secebenezer&access=1&url=bestservicenearme.com

    June 14, 2021 at 09:05 | Report abuse | Reply
  13. liquor store open near me

    https://maps.mindelheim.de/proxies/proxytour.php?url=http://www.iamkarra.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 09:47 | Report abuse | Reply
  14. financial advisor near me

    http://list-unsubscribe.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=www.heatingairconditioningcontractorsanaheimhills.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 10:12 | Report abuse | Reply
  15. buffet near me

    This blog was... how do I say it? Relevant!! Finally I've found something that helped me. Kudos!

    https://local.katc.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=https://www.fleetvehiclerepairshop.com/

    June 14, 2021 at 10:44 | Report abuse | Reply
  16. dmv near me

    http://web.hcps.ptc.edu.tw/dyna/webs/gotourl.php?url=https://www.bikecraze.com

    June 14, 2021 at 11:27 | Report abuse | Reply
  17. pools near me

    I couldnít resist commenting. Well written!

    https://www.infotiger.com/addurl.html?url=www.energygopep.com&

    June 14, 2021 at 13:30 | Report abuse | Reply
  18. houses for rent near me

    https://urm.org/n/november-splash/?redirect_to=http://sprinterrepairnearme.com

    June 14, 2021 at 16:26 | Report abuse | Reply
  19. chicken near me

    http://imp.mx/salto.php?va=https://www.usedforkliftsforsaleorangecounty.com

    June 14, 2021 at 18:44 | Report abuse | Reply
  20. RV Repair Mission Viejo

    After looking over a handful of the blog articles on your website, I honestly like your technique of blogging. I bookmarked it to my bookmark website list and will be checking back soon. Take a look at my web site too and tell me what you think.

    https://lifestream.tv/players/mocd.php?url=ocrvcenter.com/trailer-collision-repair-shop-near-me/

    June 14, 2021 at 21:57 | Report abuse | Reply
  21. RV Repairs Nearby

    Itís nearly impossible to find experienced people for this subject, however, you sound like you know what youíre talking about! Thanks

    http://innuityweb.myregisteredsite.com/admin/membership_agreement.php?partnerID=3185&domain=www.ocrvcenter.com/motorhome-furniture-near-me/

    June 14, 2021 at 22:39 | Report abuse | Reply
  22. RV Repair Huntington Beach

    https://www.shinobi.jp/etc/goto.html?http://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-acton-california

    June 14, 2021 at 22:58 | Report abuse | Reply
  23. RV Repair Shop

    Your style is really unique compared to other people I have read stuff from. I appreciate you for posting when you've got the opportunity, Guess I'll just bookmark this web site.

    https://www.waltrop.de/Inhalte/Allgemein/externerlink.asp?ziel=http://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-orange-california

    June 14, 2021 at 23:01 | Report abuse | Reply
  24. RV Repair Shops Nearby

    http://www.ric.edu/Pages/link_out.aspx?target=http://www.restauration-voiture.com/2015/11/02/actualite-john-3/john-classic-restauration-voiture-alfa-romeo-2600-touring/

    June 15, 2021 at 02:28 | Report abuse | Reply
  25. RV Repairs Near My Location

    Itís difficult to find experienced people for this subject, but you sound like you know what youíre talking about! Thanks

    http://sc.hkex.com.hk/gb/https://www.ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-indio-california

    June 15, 2021 at 03:50 | Report abuse | Reply
  26. RV Repair Shop Near My Location

    Itís difficult to find well-informed people about this subject, but you sound like you know what youíre talking about! Thanks

    https://slack-redir.net/link?url=https://capdeco-france.com/en/smartblog/4_share-the-love-for-prestashop-1-6.html

    June 15, 2021 at 04:18 | Report abuse | Reply
  27. RV Repair Near Me Now

    https://local.kxlf.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=https://ocrvcenter.com/box-truck-collision-repair-shop-near-me

    June 15, 2021 at 06:56 | Report abuse | Reply
  28. RV Repair Shops Near Me Now

    Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this information together. I once again find myself spending a significant amount of time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it!

    https://paeria.cat/ang/ajuntament/noticies.asp?Detall=True&IdNoticia=21087&Dia=-1&Mes=-1&Any=2014&IdDepartament=-1&Consulta=False&PaginaAnterior=https://www.ocrvcenter.com/rv-mechanic-near-me

    June 15, 2021 at 07:24 | Report abuse | Reply
  29. RV Repair Near Me Now

    https://glowing.com/external/link?next_url=ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-anaheim-california

    June 15, 2021 at 07:55 | Report abuse | Reply
  30. RV Repairs Near My Location

    https://store.law.com/linkredirector/default.asp?lrcat=BLOGNetwork&lrurl=https://hiphopforgood.com/2018/10/dee-1-hood-villains-my-people-need-me/

    June 15, 2021 at 08:27 | Report abuse | Reply
  31. Sprinter Repair Orange County

    Good post. I learn something new and challenging on sites I stumbleupon on a daily basis. It will always be interesting to read through content from other writers and practice a little something from their web sites.

    https://thenfljerseychinacheap.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-orange-california

    June 15, 2021 at 10:28 | Report abuse | Reply
  32. RV Repair California

    https://freedback.com/thank_you.php?u=http://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-rancho-santa-margarita-california

    June 15, 2021 at 10:32 | Report abuse | Reply
  33. Sprinter Repair Near Me

    Very good post! We are linking to this particularly great content on our website. Keep up the great writing.

    http://blog.so-net.ne.jp/_pages/mobile/step/index?u=https://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-banning-california

    June 15, 2021 at 12:54 | Report abuse | Reply
  34. RV Repair

    Everything is very open with a really clear clarification of the challenges. It was truly informative. Your site is useful. Thank you for sharing!

    http://www.ww17.freeshoutbox.net/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=https://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-lake-balboa-california/

    June 15, 2021 at 15:02 | Report abuse | Reply
  35. Nearby RV Repairs

    https://go.xscript.ir/index.php?url=http://www.ocrvcenter.com/motorhome-supplies-near-me/

    June 15, 2021 at 19:01 | Report abuse | Reply
  36. RV Repair Near My Location

    http://s5.histats.com/stats/r.php?1484558&100&34851&urlr=&hootnholler.net/a-demonstrable-failure-homeless-camping-debate-heating-up-in-aurora-cbs-denver/

    June 15, 2021 at 19:06 | Report abuse | Reply
  37. RV Repair Santa Ana

    http://www.blackfive.net/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://www.ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-calabasas-california/

    June 15, 2021 at 22:47 | Report abuse | Reply
  38. Sprinter Repair Shops Near Me

    Everything is very open with a precise description of the issues. It was really informative. Your website is useful. Thanks for sharing!

    http://biz.timesfreepress.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://www.ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-beverly-hills-california

    June 15, 2021 at 23:22 | Report abuse | Reply
  39. RV Repair Shop

    https://www.treasury.gov/cgi-bin/redirect.cgi/?https://ocrvcenter.com/rv-tv-repair-near-me

    June 16, 2021 at 06:22 | Report abuse | Reply
  40. RV Repairs Nearby

    http://telemail.jp/_pcsite/?des=015660&gsn=0156603&url=http://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-hawthorne-california/

    June 16, 2021 at 07:41 | Report abuse | Reply
  41. RV Repair San Clemente California

    An interesting discussion is definitely worth comment. There's no doubt that that you need to publish more about this topic, it may not be a taboo subject but typically people don't discuss such topics. To the next! Many thanks!!

    http://de.turismovenezia.it/index.php?id=0&lang=de&referer=ocrvcenter.com/rv-countertop-repair-near-me/

    June 16, 2021 at 08:29 | Report abuse | Reply
  42. RV Repair Near Me Now

    This web site really has all the information I wanted about this subject and didnít know who to ask.

    https://clients1.google.com.bz/url?q=https://bing.com

    June 16, 2021 at 08:45 | Report abuse | Reply
  43. RV Repair California

    Greetings! Very helpful advice within this post! It's the little changes which will make the largest changes. Thanks a lot for sharing!

    http://ams.ceu.edu/optimal/optimal.php?url=http://ecotherme.com.br/index.php/container-refrigerado/projetos-especiais/item/34-container-escritorio-porta-de-correr/34-container-escritorio-porta-de-correr?start=1150

    June 16, 2021 at 11:17 | Report abuse | Reply
  44. RV Repairs Near My Location

    I couldnít refrain from commenting. Exceptionally well written!

    https://www.ric.edu/Pages/link_out.aspx?target=https://ocrvcenter.com/rv-repair-shop-los-angeles-california

    June 16, 2021 at 11:39 | Report abuse | Reply
  45. Sprinter Repair Shop Near Me

    After checking out a number of the blog articles on your blog, I honestly appreciate your way of writing a blog. I book-marked it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back in the near future. Please check out my website too and tell me your opinion.

    https://bibliopam.ec-lyon.fr/fork?http://hootnholler.net/bill-targeting-homeless-camping-on-public-property-dies-in-tennessee-senate-committee-chattanooga-times-free-press/

    June 16, 2021 at 11:51 | Report abuse | Reply
  46. gamestop near me

    This is a topic that's close to my heart... Many thanks! Exactly where are your contact details though?

    http://antos.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=https://www.ocrvcenter.com/

    June 16, 2021 at 18:36 | Report abuse | Reply
  47. dispensaries near me

    http://ashtonsmallcigars.org/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://www.ocrvcenter.com/

    June 16, 2021 at 19:46 | Report abuse | Reply
  48. gun dealers near me

    This is a topic that is close to my heart... Thank you! Exactly where are your contact details though?

    http://www.fabulousthings.net/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=http://ocrvcenter.com

    June 16, 2021 at 20:30 | Report abuse | Reply
  49. shell near me

    http://thailady.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=ocrvcenter.com

    June 17, 2021 at 03:18 | Report abuse | Reply
  50. RV Repair California

    https://fireprotection.org.nz/Redirect.aspx?destination=ocrvcenter.com/rv-tv-repair-near-me

    June 17, 2021 at 03:59 | Report abuse | Reply
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

Leave a Reply to Dry Van Trailer Repair


 

CNN welcomes a lively and courteous discussion as long as you follow the Rules of Conduct set forth in our Terms of Service. Comments are not pre-screened before they post. You agree that anything you post may be used, along with your name and profile picture, in accordance with our Privacy Policy and the license you have granted pursuant to our Terms of Service.

Advertisement
About this blog

Get a behind-the-scenes look at the latest stories from CNN Chief Medical Correspondent, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Senior Medical Correspondent Elizabeth Cohen and the CNN Medical Unit producers. They'll share news and views on health and medical trends - info that will help you take better care of yourself and the people you love.