 |
|
|
|
September 22nd, 2011
10:27 AM ET
Never too late to find your path in lifeEditor's note: CNN contributor Amanda Enayati ponders the theme of seeking serenity - the quest for well-being and life balance in stressful times.
I had called Shilloy to discuss late bloomers, chiefly because last year, in her early 40s, she made a dramatic shift in her career as a marketing exec and went back to school to become a therapist. But as I began our interview, it was clear that something was putting her on edge. In 2006 Shilloy was recruited by a start-up technology company. Within three years, the company went bust, along with the economy. “I was brought to my knees. I was bleeding financially. My relationship had fallen apart in the midst of all of it, and I was left with nothing.” She fell into a deep despair. “I stayed in bed for most of the four months that followed. I cried and prayed and wrote about what I wanted. And I grieved. I mourned the person I thought I was going to be. I mourned the company I thought was going to take off. I mourned my home, my car, all the material things I was surrounded by that, in the end, had nothing to do with my comfort, my happiness or my salvation.” With her savings spent, she packed up her home and placed everything in storage. And she did what had once seemed unthinkable to her: She moved back to her parents’ house. “I needed to take some time to think about what was happening.” Within months, she identified that missing thing that had eluded her all those decades. “What I was meant to do fell into place. There had always been an inkling of it in my life, but I had never even slowed down to contemplate it. I was so driven by all the other things I thought I was supposed to do and so I made these unconscious decisions, and eventually the unconscious living shaped my life.” But once she was forced to stop and look around, the path she was meant to take became clear. And then it was just a matter of simple details: which school, which program, which classes. “I was having one of those magical moments. It was smooth like it was meant to be. As if the script had been written and I was finally willing to read it. It felt right and good.” I considered Shilloy’s objection to being called a late bloomer. Though unemployment is a huge source of stress for many Americans right now, that burden is especially heavy for older workers, particularly those in their 50s and 60s. Older workers fear being passed over for jobs because of their age. They fear never recovering their former salaries. They fear being discarded from the workforce altogether. Add to all that the often unspoken anxiety that because they have failed to achieve a measure of success by a certain time, they are a failure. These concerns are real and can be incredibly stressful. But consider this: In his book, "The Genius in All of Us," David Shenk writes about the science that suggests that “few of us know our true limits, that the vast majority of us have not even come close to tapping what scientists call our ‘unactualized potential.’” And if it is true that every cloud has its silver lining, perhaps what we’re seeing amid this widening crisis we’re living through - economic, social, political and environmental - is the quake that is forcing our hands without discriminating about age, gender, class or any other life circumstance. One that is making us tap into our unknown potential, forcing a bloom, demanding that we stop and rise to who it is we are and what it is we can do. Maybe we are living through the calamity that creates providence. “There is pretty much only one way to become an early bloomer. On the other hand, there are an infinite number of ways to become a so-called late bloomer.” So observes Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, a cognitive scientist and psychologist who is working on a book about late bloomers. “There are no predetermined paths to greatness. There are paths that have already come and there are those that have yet to come - ones we can’t know or predict ahead of time.” But, according to Kaufman, while we as a society are fascinated by younger people who show precocious, rapid development in comparison with their peers, those early bloomers very rarely go on to become trend setters or innovators. Late bloomers’ achievements, on the other hand, can be far-reaching because they tend to require quite complex abilities that are often years in the making. “The bigger picture here is that a person can make a career shift at any time,” says Tony Schwartz, best-selling author and performance expert. He changed careers at 47, from journalism to the path that would culminate in his founding The Energy Project, which helps individuals and organizations perform better and more sustainably. “You can begin a new career at 75; at 85, if you’re healthy enough. You’re capable of excellence at any age. I myself expect to have one more career before I’m done - maybe at 59. It is purely a question of your desire and willingness to invest the time and energy required to build skills in a particular area. And there is no greater fuel for excellence than the feeling that what you do matters.” In his work with clients, Schwartz has identified six keys to achieving excellence at any age, laid out in a 2010 Harvard Business Review piece: Pursue what you love; do the hardest work first; practice intensely; seek expert feedback in intermittent doses; take regular renewal breaks; and ritualize practice. Shilloy’s experiences bear these out: “I am working harder than I ever have. And I’m happier than I’ve ever been. The thing that has become most important to me is my connection to my purpose. People constantly say to me, ‘I wish I could do what you’re doing.’ And I think to myself: ‘Why can’t you?’” Shilloy recalls putting pen to paper one morning during those four months of depression and asking herself: “What do I want?” The answer she scribbled down that day still hangs nearby: “A life where I am present. A life where I serve. A life where I don’t resent others. A life that allows me the chance to make a difference. A life that is extraordinary. A life where I laugh often. A life full of love.” One year later, almost to the day, Shilloy's dreams are her reality. “If that is what’s called being a late bloomer, so be it. But I don’t know that I could have gotten here any earlier.” And if not a late bloomer, she is, at the very least, a woman in full bloom. soundoff (941 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 Next »Leave a Reply to RV Repair Places Near Me
« Previous entryHow did your childhood affect your sexuality?
|
  About this blog
Get a behind-the-scenes look at the latest stories from CNN Chief Medical Correspondent, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Senior Medical Correspondent Elizabeth Cohen and the CNN Medical Unit producers. They'll share news and views on health and medical trends - info that will help you take better care of yourself and the people you love.
 |
|
|
|
“Late bloomers? Late for what? What is it we’re late for?”
Hmm is anyone else having problems with the images on this blog loading? I'm trying to determine if its a problem on my end or if it's the blog. Any feed-back would be greatly appreciated.
http://www.vreyrolinomit.com/
buy cialis in las vegas cialis cialis professional vs cialis super active http://cialmenshoprx.com/ – generic cialis ’
I have been surfing online more than 3 hours today, yet I never found any attention-grabbing article like yours. It is lovely worth sufficient for me. In my opinion, if all site owners and bloggers made just right content material as you probably did, the internet might be a lot more helpful than ever before.
http://www.zortilonrel.com/
cheap viagra reviews addicted to viagra what to do if viagra doesn\'t work http://xz-pharmacyonline.com/en/career-opportunities.html – viagra blue vision ’
where can i buy viagra online best place to buy real viagra online buy viagra quick https://canadianpharmacy-usx.com/organic.htm – viagra shipped overnight united states ’
I got good info from your blog
http://www.froleprotrem.com/
cialis 20mg aus usa cialis with dapoxetine mastercard cialis daily use http://sjcialis.com/ – which is better viagra cialis or levitra ’
Social network traffic Facebook likes Twitter Followers Instagram Followers and much more
https://bit.ly/2Hnl7vE
cialis .uk generic viagra online pharmacy mexico cialis https://xz-pharmacyonline.com – Nimotop ’
Do you want get more social network traffic, likes, subscribers? Our Company provide SMM Services that means (Social Media Marketing) that is directly using social network websites such as Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn to promote a website. High Quality Services / Our prices are the cheapest in the market, starting at $0.01 / 24/7 Support / API Support for panel leaders / Best prices
https://bit.ly/2Hnl7vE
Best Marketing Services – Cheapest on Market. SMM Supreme is the Top 5 Best Social Media Website in the World. Best Quality-Price Ratio on the market with 714,928 orders until now. – Facebook Fan Page Likes for $4.50/1000 – Instagram Followers for $0.78/1000 – Youtube Views: $1.62/1000 – Twitter followers: $2.10/1000 – Paypal Deposit – Bitcoin Deposit – Fast order processing – 1 Hour Delivery (Click on the link in the profile for more details)
https://bit.ly/3iOPatX
What i don't realize is actually how you're no longer really a lot more neatly-liked than you may be now. You're very intelligent. You understand therefore significantly relating to this topic, produced me individually believe it from a lot of varied angles. Its like women and men don't seem to be fascinated until it¦s one thing to accomplish with Girl gaga! Your personal stuffs nice. Always care for it up!
http://www.froleprotrem.com/
viagra black 800mg reviews viagra for daily use disount lowest price viagra 20mg http://erectilejyzd.com/index.php?called=terms – levitra vs viagra vs viagra ’
cialis without precription canadian prescriptions cialis walmart https://impotencecdny.com/ – buy prescription drugs canada ’
viagra sublingual sildenafil 20 mg tablets price cost of female viagra http://canadianpharmacy-yy.com/Fitness/how-to-get-a-six-pack.html – lovegra ’
Seroquel walgreens online pharmacy Detrol https://canadianpharmacy-yy.com/ – canadian pharmacy kingcanadian viagra ’
buy cialis 36 hour cialis with no prescription canadian pharmacy cialis https://impotencecdny.com/info/history.php – cialis from india ’
This is a very interesting article. Please, share more like this!
https://yt1s.com/youtube-to-mp4
buy viagra online next day shipping Sinemet viagra with no prescription http://erectilejyzd.com/ – Silagra ’
prescription drugs without prior prescription viagra pharmacy 100mg overseas pharmacy forum
Hi my friend! I want to say that this post is awesome, great written and come with almost all significant infos. I'd like to peer more posts like this.
http://www.froleprotrem.com/
cost of viagra viagra no prescription buy viagra online
canada medication pharmacy levitra vs cialis vs viagra buy prescription drugs from canada
northwest pharmacy canada online pharmacies pharmacy canada
online pharmacy viagra cialis daily diabetes
Earn 5000 a Month With Our Passive Income System
http://makedollarstoday.landingbit.com/monstermodesystem
Does your site have a contact page? I'm having a tough time locating it but, I'd like to shoot you an e-mail. I've got some ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great website and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.
http://www.froleprotrem.com/
pharmacy cost comparison canadian drugs online pharmacy viagra from canada
Earn $200/Day With Our Passive Income System – Best Autopilot income system 2021
https://warriorplus.com/o2/a/r1dnf/0
Earn $400/Day With Our Passive Income System – Best Autopilot income system 2021
https://bit.ly/2Uvb6R4
buy cialis cialis dapoxetine overnight shipment lowest price generic cialis
online pet pharmacy canadian drug store buy prescription drugs online
genric viagra on line wild viagra ВЈ cheap india generic viagra online
I will immediately take hold of your rss feed as I can not find your email subscription hyperlink or e-newsletter service. Do you have any? Please permit me realize so that I may just subscribe. Thanks.
https://europa-road.eu/hu/traktor-szallitas.php
Howdy! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with Search Engine Optimization? I'm trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I'm not seeing very good results. If you know of any please share. Appreciate it!
http://www.fokuszpalyazat.hu/kezdolap/akar-60-millios-tamogatas-vallalkozasok-fejlesztesere
I was just looking for this info for some time. After 6 hours of continuous Googleing, finally I got it in your site. I wonder what is the lack of Google strategy that don't rank this type of informative websites in top of the list. Generally the top websites are full of garbage.
http://www.vreyrolinomit.com/
over the counter tadalafil https://tadalisxs.com/ tadora 20
hydroxychoriquine https://hydroxychloroquinex.com/ hydroxchloroquin
best erectile dysfunction medicine https://plaquenilx.com/ erectile injection video
zithromax 100 mg https://zithromaxes.com/ is zithromax a strong antibiotic
turned down for all payday loans flexi credit payday loans check cashing loans online
You have brought up a very fantastic details, thankyou for the post.
http://7host01.com/transferring-your-ideas-utilizing-clairvoyant-powers/
best viagra prices viagra aderal gneeric viagra online
viagra for men http://vigedon.com/ viagra cheap 100mg
paesi cialis senza ricetta amazon uk cialis cialis and adderall together
cash advance on capital one venture card payday loans baton rouge government st payday loan locations in dc
yamaha credit card cash advance payday loan columbus ne payday loan rates michigan
payday loan leduc money loans yahoo answers cash loan policy
british viagra online http://viagriyvik.com/ sildenafil citrate tablets viagra
cialis advertisement il cialis aumenta le prestazioni sportive afecta cialis embarazo