![]() |
|
September 15th, 2008
12:16 PM ET
Sharing the bed with babyBy Shahreen Abedin On Sunday we were hanging out with friends when I heard my husband say something that immediately raised red flags for me. “Yeah, by November the baby should be out of our room and in his own crib.” Gulp! About a month ago, he had voiced his desire to have our then-8-month old sleep in his own crib all night, but my compromise was to install a bed rail guard on one side, so we would have the option of putting the munchkin on one side of us, instead of between us. Yes, we are co-sleeping parents. And apparently there are many opinions about co-sleepers among “crib-sleeper” parents, as highlighted in the current issue of Parenting magazine. ( read Parenting article). According to its national survey, nearly half of all crib-sleepers feel that co-sleeper parents are “irresponsible” and that they are putting their baby’s health at risk. Almost 40 percent think we’re spoiling the baby by not fostering an independent sleeper. It’s always seemed unnatural to me that we would banish our small child to sleep alone. It was also more efficient for me to have him right there when I was breastfeeding throughout the night. And when my baby wraps his arms around my neck and snuggles with me, it’s clear that he feels secure and slumbers much better. Four other couples we know also share their beds. I’m not sure whether it matters that three of them are also of South Asian descent (like me), and the other couple is from Spain. Maybe it’s a cultural thing, since many cultures find it unusual to NOT sleep with your baby. I understand that SIDS concerns are associated with co-sleeping, and that’s why the American Academy of Pediatrics doesn’t recommend the practice. (read AAP recommendation) That’s a safer stance to take than risking parents rolling over onto their babies in bed, causing harm or even death. We started sleeping with him in the bed only after he was a couple of months old. When he was teeny he slept in the bassinet pulled up right next to me. And when he sleeps in the crib, since we never put him in our bed without one of us with him, we are careful about all of the other SIDS risk factors (read about SIDS) including keeping blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals out of the way, placing him on his back, and avoiding overheating. From a safety standpoint, we’re doing OK. No smushed babies here. One of the tenets of co-sleeping that I do think is critical is that it’s based upon agreement by all three parties: both parents and the baby. If any one of these people is uncomfortable with the arrangement, then it’s time to give it up and put “baby in the corner” (crib, that is). So, now I need to learn how to transition to this new arrangement and I need help. For you co-sleepers out there, what helped you make that transition, and when did you do it? Was it emotionally harder for you than it was for the baby? For you crib-sleepers, do you think parents like me are putting their own needs above the baby’s? If SIDS wasn’t a concern, would you still have a problem with it? <strong>Editor's Note: Medical news is a popular but sensitive subject rooted in science. We receive many comments on this blog each day; not all are posted. Our hope is that much will be learned from the sharing of useful information and personal experiences based on the medical and health topics of the blog. We encourage you to focus your comments on those medical and health topics and we appreciate your input. Thank you for your participation. |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() About this blog
Get a behind-the-scenes look at the latest stories from CNN Chief Medical Correspondent, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Senior Medical Correspondent Elizabeth Cohen and the CNN Medical Unit producers. They'll share news and views on health and medical trends - info that will help you take better care of yourself and the people you love. |
|
I have a six and a four year old. I still sleep with them every night. It is entirely because I can't seem to fall asleep without them. My bedroom is too far away from their bedroom, and I just can't sleep knowing that I won't wake up if they call for me. When they were little, I had a mattress on the floor in a separate bedroom that we slept on. It was hard like a crib mattress and free of pillows blankets and toys. It seemed much safer than getting out of bed in the middle of the night to change or feed the baby. I can't tell you how many parents that I know of who have dropped their baby in the middle of the night. I certainly would have been one of those parents.
As for intimacy between my husband and me, the kids are asleep for a good 4 hours before I go to bed. There is plenty of time for hanging out with my hubby before I actually go to bed. (Even if we didn't have kids, I might sleep in another room. My husband is a very restless sleeper, and I find it hard to sleep soundly next to him.)
All I know is that it works for us. We all get plenty of rest and get along very well. I'm sure that someday soon they will kick me out of their room, and I'll have to find a way to take back a corner of the King bed my husband thinks is all his.
My daughter just turned 3yrs and still sleeps with mom and dad(when he's home). I use to be one of those that thought letting your kids sleep with you was wrong. Now as a parent myself I feel like I'm keeping her safe.
As far as SIDS isn' safer to keep your child close than in another room where you will be less likely to hear and react quicker. Good moms don't crush their babies or let the dads.
Enjoy your baby as long as it keeps you and your little one happy and safe.
We have a 2- and a 4-year old, both girls. We have slept together since they were born. I do not regret that decision. It has been a time to bond and cuddle and be together. They're little only once and I want to be able to look back and remember those precious moments and unique conversations we have as they drift off to sleep in their Mommy's arms. It makes me feel like the luckiest person in the world. Whatever works for your family is the right thing. Don't let anyone tell you any different.
I am a psychologist and have written a book that can help parents teach their kids how to sleep independently. "Break the Co-Sleeping Habit" explains the difference between co-sleeping as a plan versus co-sleeping as a habit that parents can change. Techniques are provided that apply to all ages of children.
Well I can't say I am surprised by some of these postings. I am a co-sleeping parent and have heard it from other parents I know. The bottom line is that is is your decision as the parents. I am a new parent and as all of you parents know there are opinions about the "right" and "wrong" way to do everything involving your child. As long as you are co-sleeping responsibly, it should not be an issue. My son is 8 months old and has been sleeping through the night since 3 months. I can basically put him anywhere and he sleeps soundly. I am lucky in that. I breastfeed as well and decided on co-sleeping for a number of reasons besides the convenience of having him next to me for nursing.
I understand it is not for everyone but I can't stand people using these awful scare tactics to stray people from co-sleeping. Leave co-sleeping parents alone! My son is such a happy boy and even though he is only 8 months old he definitely shows no signs of insecurity. He goes to anyone that wants to hold him and loves other babies. All I ever hear is how laid back and happy he is. I know it's a long road from him being an adult but I feel I am helping him know that he is very loved and that his mommy and daddy will always be here when he needs us.
My mother lost a baby to SIDS and she did not co-sleep. For all of you that are throwing that around and not experienced it firsthand, please stop. I hope that no one pondering the idea of co-sleeping has let people sway them from it. Just read into the safe ways to do it and you will be ok.
As for the original question of when and how to switch to a crib...I am in the same boat. But from everyone I talked to, every child is different. Sorry I couldn't offer my advice, but I couldn't pass this posting up and not say something. So best of luck to you and sweet co-sleeping. 🙂
This is *not* a cultural thing.
My wife and I are both caucasian (white anglo-saxon american) and sleep with our child, just like our parents did (whom are all white anglo-saxon.)
Felt the need to burst the bubble that co sleeping is only done by african/asian cultures.
Human beings the only mammal that tries to put their babies in another room...There is too much information out there, research it yourself. US has highest infant mortality of any industrialized nation.
I would never put my baby/ young child in a room to sleep. I think its completly unsafe!
SIDS is believed to be caused by overheating and overcooling – not being good ad temp regulation....a mother sleeping next to a baby does this naturally with out even waking up.
SUFFOCATION IS SOMETHING DIFFERENT.
Also, sometimes babys "stop" breathing. When a steady breathing rythym is nearby, it reminds the baby to breath.
Yes there are times when it is not approp. Drugs, Alcohol, overtired, Obese....
Also, all of my children are ready for a sleepover at relatives houses whenever...They have NO separation anxiety. 🙂
I'm just commenting to let you be aware of of the excellent discovery my cousin's child enjoyed going through your blog. She discovered a wide variety of details, most notably how it is like to have a very effective coaching heart to get many more effortlessly fully understand certain complicated matters. You actually did more than my desires. I appreciate you for displaying such great, healthy, educational and also cool guidance on that topic to Evelyn. https://hiedmedsout.com/
Thanks for your own work on this website. My mum take interest in setting aside time for research and it is simple to grasp why. We hear all about the compelling form you convey advantageous guidance by means of the blog and attract contribution from other individuals about this area and my child has always been becoming educated a great deal. Enjoy the remaining portion of the new year. You're carrying out a brilliant job. https://habebihookahbar.com/
It's amazing t᧐ visit this ѕite and reading the views of all colleagues concerning this parɑɡraph, while I am also eager of getting knowledge.
Feel free to ѕurf to my site: sufficing
I'm commenting to let you be aware of of the amazing discovery my child developed browsing the blog. She came to find a good number of details, including how it is like to have a great coaching character to get a number of people clearly completely grasp a number of advanced issues. You actually did more than her desires. I appreciate you for churning out such beneficial, dependable, edifying and cool guidance on that topic to Emily. https://abilifyaripiprazoles.com/
I realized more something totally new on this fat loss issue. 1 issue is that good nutrition is very vital whenever dieting. An enormous reduction in junk food, sugary food items, fried foods, sugary foods, beef, and whitened flour products could be necessary. Keeping wastes parasitic organisms, and toxic compounds may prevent targets for fat loss. While specific drugs in the short term solve the situation, the awful side effects usually are not worth it, and so they never offer you more than a momentary solution. This is a known undeniable fact that 95% of dietary fads fail. Thank you for sharing your opinions on this website. https://osteoporosismedi.com osteoporosis threatment https://osteoporosismedi.com/
https://www.electricpercolatorcoffeepot.com/10-top-coffee-bloggers/
Ja naprawdę wartość twoją dzieło, Świetny post szybki test na przeciwciała koronawirus test płytkowy przeciwciała. https://testplytkowyn.pl/
Bardzo interesujący temat, dzięki za wysłanie wiadomości trenażer oddechu trenażer oddechu. https://trenazeroddechun.pl/
buy alprostadil cream online https://alprostadildrugs.com/ parkinson and alprostadil
tadalafil daily use https://elitadalafill.com/ what is tadalafil
sildenafil generic no prescription https://eunicesildenafilcitrate.com/ 20 mg sildenafil 689
buy vardenafil over the counter with no pres. online https://vegavardenafil.com/ levitra generic vardenafil
zithromax medication https://zithromaxes.com/ z pak direction
alprostadil vs bimix vs trimix https://alprostadildrugs.com/ how much is alprostadil
buy vardenafil over the counter online https://vegavardenafil.com/ vardenafil hcl generic
cialis, sale, canadian pharm. https://canadacialisstore.com/ do you need prescription for canadian perscribition of cialis in usa
average perscription pills taken by 65 year old canadian? https://canadapillstorex.com/ canadian pharmacies ed pills
tadalafil 30 mg https://elitadalafill.com/ tadalafil 30 mg
erectile dysfunction pills https://canadaerectiledysfunctionpills.com/ is erectile dysfunction dangerous
cloraquinn https://chloroquineorigin.com/ is chloroquine an antibiotic
buy priligy priligy tablets uk
chloroquine malaria generic chloroquine phosphate clonidin aralen where to buy https://chloroquineorigin.com/
buy cyclosporine cyclomune eye drops 1%
tadalafil cost walmart https://tadagatadalafil.com/ tadalafil generic where to buy prescription tadalafil online cialis without prescription
avana india avana canada
vidalista 60 mg https://tadalisxs.com/ mambo 36 ingredients
tadalafil sublingual buy cialis tadalafil blood pressure
plaquenil wiki chloroquine phosphate aralen hydroxychloroquine tablet
tadalafil brands side effects of tadalafil cialis tadalafil
tuf 20 tadalafil generic cialis online fast shipping what is tadalafil 20 mg
chlooquine france soir is chloroquine available over the counter
difference between chloroquine phosphate and hydroxychloroquine what is clonidine is hydroxychloroquine the same as quinine
sildenafil 100mg cost https://pharmaceptica.com/
chlorowuine https://pharmaceptica.com/
generic viagra sildenafil citrate https://pharmaceptica.com/
sildenafil tablets in india https://www.pharmaceptica.com/
sildenafil 100mg for sale uk https://www.pharmaceptica.com/
is erectile dysfunction secondary to ptsd https://pharmaceptica.com/