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April 7th, 2011
08:29 AM ET
Female infidelity: It's different from the guysIan Kerner, a sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author, blogs about sex on Thursdays on The Chart. Read more from him at his website, GoodInBed.
It's often said that men cheat for sex, while women cheat for love, the theory being that men can more easily compartmentalize sex and emotion, while women typically need to experience an emotional connection to a person before feeling sexual desire. Without those pesky emotions to stand in the way of a potential mistake, a guy is much more likely to get himself into trouble (especially if alcohol is involved and inhibitions are down) or to get involved with someone for whom he has no feelings. That’s not to say that men don't cheat because they're unhappy, in search of an emotional connection or simply bored in their relationship (a topic we’re currently analyzing at Good in Bed), but many of the men I've encountered who have cheated on their wives often have no desire to leave their primary relationship. Many of them even characterize themselves as happily married with satisfying sex lives. That’s one of the reasons there's often a better chance that a couple will stay together and try to work things out when it’s the man who’s doing the cheating, rather than the woman. For men, cheating often tends to be opportunistic—they’re in the wrong place at the wrong time and the cheating doesn’t necessarily mean anything emotionally—whereas with women the desire to cheat is often less opportunistic and more deeply felt. It’s often more a matter of the heart than of the genitals. Sure, some women cheat for the sex, but many also cheat for another chance at love, or to confirm to themselves that their primary relationship is really over. A woman who cheats is often a woman who doesn't want to work it out. She's already invested time trying to work it out, and she's done. It's too late. While there aren't any hard statistics on female infidelity, most experts agree that it's on the rise, especially among women who have their own careers and a degree of financial independence. A University of Washington study found that people who earned $75,000 or more per year were 1.5 times more likely to have had extramarital sex than those earning less than $30,000. And with so many women in the workplace, it’s no surprise that among the spouses who cheated, 46 percent of women and 62 percent of men did so with someone they met through work. Another big factor in the rise in female infidelity is the Internet. Sexual infidelity often starts with emotional infidelity, and digital technologies offer an abundance of opportunity for emotional (and thrilling) connections: The return of an ex, a workplace flirtation, a Facebook friendship that becomes more than "just friends." Women are extremely susceptible to “emotional infidelity,” which starts as friendship, often with colleagues or seemingly harmless online relationships, and slowly progresses to something more. A gradual blurring of the lines between friendship and deeper intimacy draws even happily partnered people into relationships they never saw coming. So what are some of the signs that a woman could be cheating or thinking about it? - She shows less general interest in her partner's comings and goings - She dresses up for work, but seems to care less about whether her partner finds her attractive - She has less interest in sex with her partner - She's keeping an irregular schedule and spending more time at work - She seems happy, except when she's around her partner - She shows less tolerance of her partner's friends and family - There are unresolved issues in the relationship that have either been ignored or not resolved in a way that's satisfying to her - She's in a child-centric marriage that prioritizes parenting and neglects a couple's relationship, with few opportunities for romance and alone time Guys, think your wife would never cheat? Think again. When men get angry about something, they tend to lash out, but women often self-silence and bottle up their emotions. As Helen E. Fisher, research professor of anthropology at Rutgers University, says, "Men want to think women don't cheat, and women want men to think they don't cheat, and therefore the sexes have been playing a little psychological game with each other." Maybe this isn’t so much a game as a reflection of the double standard and culture of forgiveness that favors men—“boys will be boys,” as the adage goes—when they cheat. But as we’re learning, cheating is an equal opportunity sport, one that women are just as likely as men to play. |
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i have work hard and tried everything i could to get my lover back but nothing works out for me to get him back, till i came across a great man profile called Priest Oduma a love spell caster that helped me get my lover back to me within the period of 2days i want to say with his great power he has save so many lifes and relationship he was the only man i contacted and his magic really brought my ex back for in case you need his help for your relationship to be restored you can call his mobile +2348153363047 or email him via his email address
spellofsolution@gmail.com
I AM REALLY PLEASED I FINALLY GOT MY EX BACK ALL THANKS TO PRIEST ODUMA
BRIZZ LUKE
USA
just yesterday i have been turned into a happy man. i met with this great spell caster and i have just get back my girlfriend and i am now happy that at last we are finally together all the thanks to the man that i met on the Email: redconversantspell@gmail.com
Please, please try, prophetesene@yahoo.com is amazing, I am so happy and pleased he has brought me and my woman together and i will be eternally grateful for that.
Hello readers,
my name is juliet i want to testify about a great spell caster that help me cast a spell that bring my ex boyfriend back to without collecting any money from me. I broke up with my ex with just little misunderstanding hoping we will get back shortly,but things was growing worser until i contacted Dr.Igbodo who help me with his historical powers to bring him back, without charging me any money, i have never believed in a spell caster until i come across Dr.Igbodo. Well it will be of great sin if i should go out from here without dropping the contact of this great spell caster,in case you need the help of this great spell caster you can contact him through his email:igbodospiritualtemple@gmail.com
once you contact him all your problems will be over,once again i say very big thanks to you sir for helping me to recover my ex back, and please sir keep your good work cause people need your help
'
My Name is JANE.I will love to share my testimony to all the people in the forum cos i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The girl i want to get marry to left me 4 weeks to our wedding for another man..,When i called her she never picked my calls,She deleted me on her facebook and she changed her facebook status from married to Single...when i went to her to her place of work she told her boss she never want to see me..I lost my job as a result of this cos i cant get myself anymore,my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life...I tried all i could do to have her back to all did not work out until i met a Man when i Travel to Africa to execute some business have been developing some years back..I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting her back and how i lost my job...he told me he gonna help me...i don't believe that in the first place.but he swore he will help me out and he told me the reason why my girlfriend left me and also told me some hidden secrets.i was amazed when i heard that from him..he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of days..then i travel back to US the following day and i called him when i got home and he said he's busy casting those spells and he has bought all the materials needed for the spells,he said am gonna see positive results in the next 2 days that is Thursday...My girlfriend called me at exactly 12:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all she had done ..she said,she never knew what she's doing and her sudden behavior was not intentional and she promised not to do that again.it was like am dreaming when i heard that from her and when we ended the call,i called the man and told him my wife called and he said i haven't seen anything yet... he said i will also get my job back in 3 days time..and when its Sunday,they called me at my place of work that i should resume working on Monday and they gonna compensate me for the time limit have spent at home without working..My life is back into shape,i have my girlfriend back and we are happily married now with kids and i have my job back too.This man is really powerful..if we have up to 20 people like him in the world,the world would have been a better place..he has also helped many of my friends to solve many problems and they are all happy now..Am posting this to the forum for anybody that is interested in meeting the man for help.you can mail him to Lavenderlovespell@gmail.com I cant give out his number cos he told me he don't want to be disturbed by many people across the world..he said his email is okay and he' will replied to any emails asap..hope he helped u out too..good luck:Lavenderlovespell@gmail.com.ONCE AGAIN HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS: Lavenderlovespell@gmail.com
My name is cynthia and my ex-boyfriend dumped me 8 months ago after I caught him of having an affair with someone else and insulting him. I want him back in my life but he refuse to have any contact with me. I was so confuse and don't know what to do, so I visited the INTERNET for help and I saw a testimony on how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so I contact the spell caster and explain my problems to him..... he cast a spell for me and assure me of 3 days that my ex will return to me and to my greatest surprise the third day my peter came knocking on my door and beg for forgiveness. I am so happy that my love is back again and not only that, we are about to get married. Once again thank you agagu spell caster, you are truly talented and gifted contact his email: agagulovespll@gmail.com
My name is Ana from USA, my lover is back with the great help from Dr Henry Olu he help me cast a spell that brought him back to my arms in just two days. my lover left me with out a formal notification and now he is back, once again i want to thank Dr Henry Olu for his wonderful spell, am now a happy woman. you can contact the great spell caster on his email: agagaulovespell@yahoo.com
I am sharing my testimony to everyone that has tried everything possible and had lost hope on how they can get their ex back, i want you all to know that their is one man called priest Oduma that work for me and after 2days of his spell brought my ex back to me without any delay, i am really happy now that we are together again and we are living happily with so much love and respect for each other, so i will advise everyone to ask for this same man's help so that you can be happy again and make your dreams and wishes you have with your ex come true just contact him via his email address spellofsolution@gmail.com or call him via his mobile number +2348153363047 he can help you without any delay.
THANKS TO PRIEST ODUMA FOR YOUR HELP
maris
usa
I want to use this opportunity to thank Dr. Olokum for helping me get my lover back after he left me few months ago. I have sent friends and my brothers to beg him for me but he refused that it is all over between both of us but when I met this Dr. Olokum he told me to relaxed that every thing will be fine and really after just a week I got my man back. so thank you so much Olokum. here is the email and phone number of Dr. Olokum LAVENDERLOVESPELL@gmail.com
I recently saw a testimony about a spell caster of some sort in a blog I visit for relationship and marriage counselling problems and I just thought after ripped off the previous year of almost about $580, I should try it*maybe out of desperation of some sort*..and I contacted them..Atfirst everything felt dreamy and unbelievable,their consultations and solution was a little bit easy and strange and I was scared a little cos I heard read and heard lots of stories of fake spell casters and scammers ripping people off their money..I played along with a little hope and and faith and I was sent some few stuffs after everything and it worked like a miracle,everything went to a while new direction,it was and is amazing...I guess it was all good faith that made me read That particular post that faithful day..I hope they could help other people too like they did me...I did a little and I got everything I wanted and wished for*my husband,my family and my life back*their redconversantspell@gmail.com for more information.
What a beautiful and wonderful testimony some time things you don't believe can just happen.
My name is Cherry Johnson from U.S.A am 25 years old i got married at the age of 23 i have only one child and i was living happily .After one year of my marriage my husband behavior became so strange and i don't really understand what was going on, he packed out of the house to another woman i love him so much that i never dream's of losing him, i try my possible best to make sure that my husband get back to me but all to no avail i cry and i cry seeking for help i discussed it with my best friend and she promise to help me he told me of a man called Dr Fred he is a very great man and a real man that can be trusted and there is nothing concerning love issues he cannot do that is why they call him Dr Fred. I contacted his email address at (tradionalspelltemple@yahoo.com) And i told him everything that happen all he told me is that i should not worry that all my problems will be solved immediately. He told me what to do to get my husband back and i did, he said after 3days my husband will come back to me and start begging, it really happen i was very surprise and very, very happy our relationship was now very tight and we both live happily again. So my advice for you now is to contact this same email address (tradionalspelltemple@yahoo.com) if you are in any kind of situation concerning love issues and any other things that give you problems.
THANKS..
I'm short of words here, my name Audrey from Canada, I don’t know what to say about what DR lakuta has done for me.My lover left me for almost 2year,i really loved my husband Steve because he was my first love,When he left me i taught this world was over,But when i came in contact with DR lakuta he just told me that my lover will be back within 24hours and that he will love and respect me. So the most surprising thing is that my lover is now back to me and we are now together, My lover bought me a nice car and now i also have access to his bank account because i saw a lady's testimony about DR lakuta who helped her to make her get access to her husband account and now same thing just happened to me. Am so grateful to DR lakuta. Please DR lakuta is a great man..contact him for any kind of help.. His private mail lakutaspelltemple@gmail.com
Thanks to Priest Okiti is a really a great spell caster he
brought back my lover back in just 2days after six
months of me and my lover been apart he is
really helpful you can reach him on his email
address for any kind of help on
Okitispell@gmail.com or better
still you can call him on his phone number on
2347061984303
from
-Uk
my name is Anabella from USA, I want to thank the great ODUDUWA for what he did for me he brought happiness back into my life. My boyfriend left me and told me is over I was devastated as I loved him so much I decided to contact a spellcaster and I met a friend who told me of a great doctor and I decided to contact him and he told me in three days my boyfriend will call me and beg me to acept him I thought he was joking in three days everything happened as he said I am so happy now.
You can also contact him at kpotikispelltemple@gmail.com for any kind of help,
An amazing testimony of a spell caster that help me get my husband back to
me.
My name is Tracy Adam i lived in U S A and i have 4 kids, before i was having problems with my husband which make him hate us so much that
even lead to break up and leave us to another woman, until a friend of mine
directed me to this man called Dr. Okungbor, i contacted him and he start
to cast the spell immediately, then he help me and i get my husband back in
peace and we are now happy family am very much thankful to Dr. Okungbor
that help me,so i must tell the people how good he his. I will advice you
to contact him through this email Greatokungborsolutionhome@gmail.com or call his mobile number +2348156784928 for any help.Then your problem will
be solve
My Name is JACOB WESTLEY..I never believed in Love Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster when i contact this man called okutemple@gmail.com Execute some business..He is really powerful..My wife divorce me with no reason for almost 4 years and i tried all i could to have her back cos i really love her so much but all my effort did not work out.. we met at our early age at the college and we both have feelings for each other and we got married happily for 5 years with no kid and she woke up one morning and she told me she’s going on a divorce..i thought it was a joke and when she came back from work she tender to me a divorce letter and she packed all her loads from my house..i ran mad and i tried all i could to have her back but all did not work out..i was lonely for almost 4 years…So when i told the spell caster what happened he said he will help me and he asked for her full name and her picture..i gave him that..At first i was skeptical but i gave it a try cos have tried so many spell casters and there is no solution…so when he finished with the readings,he got back to me that she’s with a man and that man is the reason why she left me…The spell caster said he will help me with a spell that will surely bring her back.but i never believe all this…he told me i will see a positive result within 3 days..3 days later,she called me herself and came to me apologizing I NEVER BELIEVED IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL I MET THIS WORLD'S TOP SPELL CASTER. HE IS REALLY POWERFUL AND COULD HELP CAST SPELLS TO BRING BACK ONE'S GONE,LOST,MISBEHAVING LOVER AND MAGIC MONEY SPELL OR SPELL FOR A GOOD JOB.I'M NOW HAPPY & A LIVING TESTIMONY COS THE WOMAN I HAD WANTED TO MARRY LEFT ME 2 WEEKS BEFORE OUR WEDDING AND MY LIFE WAS UPSIDE DOWN COS OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN ON FOR 2YEARS... I REALLY LOVED HIM, BUT HIS MOTHER WAS AGAINST US AND HE HAD NO GOOD PAYING JOB. SO WHEN I MET THIS SPELL CASTER, I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED AND EXPLAINED THE SITUATION OF THINGS TO HIM..AT FIRST I WAS UNDECIDED,SKEPTICAL AND DOUBTFUL, BUT I JUST GAVE IT A TRY. AND IN 7 DAYS WHEN I RETURNED TO USA, MY GIRLFRIEND(NOW WIFE) CALLED ME BY HERSELF AND CAME TO ME APOLOGIZING THAT EVERYTHING HAD BEEN SETTLED WITH HIS MOM AND FAMILY AND SHE GOT A NEW JOB INTERVIEW SO WE SHOULD GET MARRIED..I DIDN'T BELIEVE IT COS THE SPELL CASTER ONLY ASKED FOR MY NAME AND MY GIRLFRIENDS NAME AND ALL I WANTED HIM TO DO... WELL WE ARE HAPPILY MARRIED NOW AND WE ARE EXPECTING OUR LITTLE KID,AND MY WIFE ALSO GOT THE NEW JOB AND OUR LIVES BECAME MUCH BETTER. IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS THE SPELL CASTER FOR SOME HELP, HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS;okutemple@gmail.com ......HOPE HE HELPS YOU OUT OUR OPPORTUNITY ... CONTACT THIS GREAT SPELL CASTER VIA EMAIL:okutemple@gmail.com...